FAQ: How to Pass a Drug Test

[burn it]

hey is their another faster way to clean your system
am a heavy smoker and is their like a way to clean your system
less then 4 days.

[randude]

One time I was given a random test by my employer. I was told to drive to this clinic a few miles away. I quickly drove to a bong shop in town and told them. They sold me some synthetic urine (liquid form). I heated it as quickly as I could on my truck defroster vent. It got pretty hot. You cannot get too hot either. I put it in a condom and rubber banded it to my leg. When I went to take the test I was alone, but nobody actually looks at your penis as you pee anyway (I have had those kinds of test too). The lady that did the testing thought my piss was a little cold, but she let it slide. I got lucky. I passed the test.

My way would work with someone watching or not I think, because they just go in the room and try not to stare. If you pretend with your back towards someone to piss from the condom it will work.

Temperature. We need a way to get a decent temperature reading before you go in. I do not remember what the range is, but it is like 97-101 or something like that. You can heat the urine the way I did, but you really do not know how warm it is. You would think that warm to the touch would be good, but it was not good enough in my case. They have these temperature strips much like what is in the specimine bottle, and that is probably the key.

I think I may have a urine test but don't know in about a week and a half. I have lost most of my body fat from the stress of a court appearance and although I have some Killer Sour Diesel I am going to just try to not smoke any of it. Tall order. I am a small toker anyway, a half a joint or so a day. I believe that the water thing will work, and I am taking vitamins, so that is the route I will take this time if I decide I cannot go a week and a half without smoking. I am going before a judge on DUI and pocession of about 3 grams (Virginia Courts) and I am going in telling them that I have changed my ways since the arrest (April). If the judge wants to prove what I am saying is true or not I suppose he can order a urine test. I guess I am so freaked out that my mind is racing and I am thinking of what can happen. I do know that Michael Vick was put in jail for failing a drug test (THC, Like that should even matter) and he went before a Virginia judge.

Any thought, encouragement or whatever is welcome. I am terrified.

[burn it]

Your lucky man
I get checked man and theirs no bong shop in my town that's what sucks.

[ChronJohn]

dam guys you saved my life thanks mass its for a scholarship lol

[BudSmoker]

lol.. i was stupid that day.. i know hash is like marijuana.. the thc.. duh..lol!! im laughing at what i wrote.. ha

[happiehippie]

Whats up men.....I can ad some personal experince. I was lucky enough (if you want too call it that) to get work realese one time when i was in jail and was getting piss tested avery week and was working out side in the 100 degree heat in the summer (im a welder and it gets piss hot) and thought I was doing a good job by drinking a lot of water to stay hydraited, and guess what, in KY if you are in jail and get work realese, dont think you can drink water too stay healthy, cause you cant. They piss tested me one week and said I was trying to hide something becuase there was too much water in my piss !!!!!!!!! So they yanked my work realese and stuck me in the hole for the rest of my time!!!!! (90 days) The shits of it was, the whole time I was in, I was smoking a little the whole time and that week I could not hook up with my man (security guard that finally got busted bringing it in), and that week I get busted for WATER!!!! NOT WEED !!!!!! not once did I get busted for the weed I was smoking ONLY WATER !!!!what a bunch of idiots they got here in KY !!!!!!
Just thought Id throw my 2 cents worth

[Allanim]

Going to use the Authentic Urine sample provided by Urineperfect.com tomorrow for a test. can anyone give me any insight on this product. has anyone here known people who have passed using it? anyone know someone that has failed? any other information such as how long it will take to heat the specimen using a heating pad? how long will the temperature stay in the range once i have it heated to the correct temperature?

I was freaking out a week ago . but im now feeling alot more confident about this due to the fact that the website reports there has never been a report of anyone failing there test using this. I just like to do my home work and have as much possible information as i can when i go in there?

Test is being done at lab Corps if anyone has any specific information about the lab corp procedure that would also be helpful. thank you in advance its a shame the things that good honest hard working people have to go through just to smoke some pot.

[happiehippie]

keep the stuff in your nut area and the temp should be fine....or you armpit. PEACE

[Allanim]

So im literally about to get in the car and head up to the Lab the temp gauge says that its running at 98 degrees before i strapped it onto myself it was running 96 in 5 mins it went up 2 degrees it seems. im using both heating packs and its sitting right under my stomach area think i am Good to go or should i wait and check temp in 20 mins?

[happiehippie]

go with it.....good luck

[Allanim]

Okay so i just got back from LabCorp everything went pretty smoothly Temp checked out fine the sealed it up and sent it off to the lab. This was a pre employment drug test.

The only thing that went wrong was there just shy of the amount that they wanted me to pee in the pouch. so to compensate for that i put a little of my own urine in it. I am a pretty heavy smoker between me and my g/f we go through about a half zone of mids a week. if i had to estimate id say maybe 5% of the specimen was my own urine and 95% of it was clean. is this going to come back to haunt me and make me fail? My honest opinion is that is to little of an amount to cause my sample to go over the 50nano threshhold? Please give some feed back while i roll a blunt and get ready for bed and thank you so much

[Jimi Bling]

Heres an interesting drug test story:
3 months ago I had court for a simple possession case...which is no longer a crime in Michigan...but thats another whole issue. Anyways I went to the local health food store and bough an off brand detox product.
i can't remember exactly what it was called but it cost me half the price Ready Clean would cost. So I followed the instructions exactly and went it for the test and not only did it not work, my piss showed up false positive for opiates...which when sent to the lab confirmed a trace amount of morphine. Now as far as I know, the only way to get morphine is to have surgury in a hospital or something. I never even heard of a black market for morphine. I retraced my steps back a few days and I'm sure that I didn't have anything with poppy seeds, nightquil, or any of the other common opiate false positives. Well according to my PO a false positive is still a positive and she amended my probation to include an outpatient rehab program which i can't afford. I attempted to get state help to pay for it but got denied based on the fact that I had no drugs in my system at the time...including the THC, and a false positive a month before hand is not means to qualify for a state funded rehab program. I could've lied and got the funds needed but thats just not right, and plus my po said "make sure you're honest". So now I'm up for a 93 day bid over simple possession of about a gram.

Just something to think about when choosing a detox product.