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First guerilla grow - My tale of woe

How many mistakes can one person make on their first foray into guerilla growing? Lots and I have the tale to prove it.

Thought I would try autos for an outdoor grow. My region is not known for its growing season being in the mountains of Alberta Canada. Read the instructions on the packages (CKS) and started them end of June!! Oh my! Put them outside in my special dirt bags (sew them myself).

Placed the dirtbags into their secret locations first while the plants were hatching and growing. Did this in groups because I don't have that much room at home. In the beginning there was too much water and a great deal of heat. Then the season tamed a bit and the weather was wonderful, the best summer we've had since I moved here many years ago.

I would visit the babies when I could but not more than once a month. I kept three autos in the backyard. My neighbours knew this as they are all smokers too. My backyard babies were growing like crazy, beautiful! My one candy cane was 3 feet tall and getting some seriously decent colas. I did notice a few buds were missing but I thought it was deer.

One day came home from work and the most beautiful cola was gone. It had a bud on it that was like a pop can. I couldn't put my fingers around it and it was sticky and amazing. Suddenly gone, poof. I must have stood there (seriously) for two minutes just staring at the missing cola. I did notice in a smaller bud a silver thing that was shining. I plucked it. It was a hair about 8 inches long and grey. My hair is very short. The thief gave themselves away with that hair (a neighbour). I put a lock on my gate and carried on as usual.

The neighbour came over one night and asked why the gate was locked and I told her that someone was helping themselves and I wanted it to stop (not mentioning that I knew it was her). A few days later I got a call from my landlord (I own a mobile but rent the lot its on) and he says we have an issue. I grab the plants, heave them into my truck and dash off into the wild. I put them in a swamp and return home. Landlord says he got an anonymous tip that I was growing and I said I was. He said "you was??" I said yes I was...growing medicinal catnip. He laughs and I said yes it was what you think but they are gone gone gone.. He said he didn't care if I had a permit but since I don't if I didn't rehome them he would have called the RCMP.

So the weather turns bad (ie cold snow frost) and I have to get my babies and bring them home. I put them in a kiddie pool under all the lights I could gather (LED's, T5's, CFL's) and was taking stock.

They were so stunted!! One area did not do well because of lack of water and deer!If you make a path in the bushes the deer will follow it and check out whatever you have going on. Another area did really well but I should have planted or started the seeds in May!!! Another area didn't do too well because too much water and not enough sun. And my beautiful babies from the backyard got aphids and frost bite!!!

How many mistakes have I made??
I told someone what I was doing and got robbed and reported.
I did not read the packages correctly and thought flowering time meant the plants whole life not flowering time.
I got frost bite. (not watching weather reports)
I got aphids!!! (I had to wrestle the plants into the bathtub and broke some)
I got mold!! (not enough ventilation)
I have lost at least 1/2 to 2/3 of my crop and I could just cry!!!

I did learn some good things though too.

SAY NOTHING TO ANYONE (it is far better to say nothing and have people think you are stupid than to open your mouth and remove all doubt)
My dirtbags work well.
Start plants way sooner.
Plant in BC their climate is better.

Live and learn.

Why Doe

New Member
Good read! My first grow went off without a hiccup lol. I did lots of research before I started though


great story. I agree , don't tell anyone. even if they don't report you and steal from you they will constantly nag you for weed. you should prank that neighbour
I thought about that. If she called the RCMP then I thought I would throw a few of my dying plants into her backyard but it would be a never ending carousel of stupid. I smile I wave be a nice neighbour and people will leave you alone. As I said next year I plant in BC
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