Help

[troubledyouth]

Ive been trying to detox for 2 weeks now (water, cran juice, niacin, working out etc)
ive taken 3 home drug tests and failed all of them.
i have been smoking heavily for the past year probably 2 days a month at most without smoking.
i got caught up in a bs conspiracy charge and now i have to pass a substance abuse screening to keep myself out of prison for up to 5 years.
im over 300 lbs and need to possibly pass a test on tuesday.
i tested a drink that is supposed to make you pass a test in an hour or so. i waited 2+ hours before taking the final test and i still failed.
please help me i dont want to go to prison.

 

[Siscokid]

Hey bro, my Uncles (felons) have swore that when they needed to take a drug test they would use Aloe, Google it...

 

[Les Doodess]

I don't know a great answer, but...

The drink you tested, by waiting longer than recommended (2 hours rather than 1 hour) you may not get the results you are looking for.

Imagine an eye dropper of red dye that drops in a glass of clear water 1 drop every 10 minutes. In an hour the glass has 6 drops, which if you were testing for the color red, you may not see. But that same glass after 2 hours would have 12 drops and most definitely red.

Essentially they test for a metabolite secreted by your body after it processes thc and works similar to this dye drops in a glass of water. You are looking to clear your bladder with a detox method, then flush your bladder with plain water. You want fluid coming out that has been in your body the shortest possible time.

So detox, wake up the next morning and drink as much water as possible. Pee like 5 times before you go to test, so you are good and flushed out. Then pee, pound some water or juice and go test as fast as possible. When you test pee a little first to clear out residue and then fill up their specimen midstream

Understanding what you are doing to your body might help find a good solution.

 

[Siscokid]

Aloe Detox

 

[Siscokid]

I don't know a great answer, but...

The drink you tested, by waiting longer than recommended (2 hours rather than 1 hour) you may not get the results you are looking for.

Imagine an eye dropper of red dye that drops in a glass of clear water 1 drop every 10 minutes. In an hour the glass has 6 drops, which if you were testing for the color red, you may not see. But that same glass after 2 hours would have 12 drops and most definitely red.

Essentially they test for a metabolite secreted by your body after it processes thc and works similar to this dye drops in a glass of water. You are looking to clear your bladder with a detox method, then flush your bladder with plain water. You want fluid coming out that has been in your body the shortest possible time.

So detox, wake up the next morning and drink as much water as possible. Pee like 5 times before you go to test, so you are good and flushed out. Then pee, pound some water or juice and go test as fast as possible. When you test pee a little first to clear out residue and then fill up their specimen midstream

Understanding what you are doing to your body might help find a good solution.

I also passed a drug test like this, drank water till I peed real clear, took a vitamin c tablet to give it a little color and kept drinking (for like 24 hrs) I couldn't wait to piss in the cup cause I really had to go after all that water..

But like I said in my previous post, my uncles swear that just before they go see thier PO they would take a branch and eat the inside or make a shake and that was it. They are still out wondering the streets so I'm sure it works. Do a combination of both and do another self test.

 

[TorturedSoul]

If you've just been assigned probation, you are probably expected to fail your first test. And the next several, the best you could hope for is a demonstrable reduction that shows that you quit when you got nailed - as, obviously, you don't start urinating clean the minute you quit.

Err... One does assume that this is your first drug test that you're dreading and that you have been intelligent enough to quit. If that is not the case then all bets are off (and I wish you luck).

And if this is not a test for your PO and is instead some kind of pre-trial (or pre-sentencing) hoop that you are jumping through in order to show some kind of... "character" that you have (I don't know what they call it), something to help show that you are not a "wicked criminal element," then I would have your lawyer stomp all over it if there is ANY hope that such a thing - whether the result is positive or negative - is not directly related to the crime of which you have been charged. After all, if you helped plan a bank heist (lol), it would have nothing to do with whether or not you consume cannabis or any other tested-for substance. For that matter, if I were a lawyer and you were charged with conspiracy to grow or sell, I would postulate to the jury (or judge, if you used a strategy that involved NOT exercising your right to a jury) that the only thing that a positive test would show is that you were consuming the product in question - which would be a "positive" in arguing that your intent in growing was for personal use and not commercial. (Of course, if you got nailed in an active sale, that's not going to work.)

Regardless, good luck.

 

[greenadvocate]

I also passed a drug test like this, drank water till I peed real clear, took a vitamin c tablet to give it a little color and kept drinking (for like 24 hrs) I couldn't wait to piss in the cup cause I really had to go after all that water..

But like I said in my previous post, my uncles swear that just before they go see thier PO they would take a branch and eat the inside or make a shake and that was it. They are still out wondering the streets so I'm sure it works. Do a combination of both and do another self test.

I looked into this a few years back... you dont want to be taking any multivitamins or vitamin C within 48 hours of going for the test, these somehow increase the concentration of the 'giveaway' chemical in your urine.

You can get very convincing fake urines, some of them actually have an exothermic reaction with water, therefore when you hand your sample to the guy itll be warm and everything. Your best off strapping a little sachet of the stuff to your upper thigh, getting water into the cup will be your next challenge, if you can scoop some out the toilet - problem solved but im not sure you can guarantee it.
Being a big lad, Im sure you can hide a sachet of water and a sachet of this stuff somewhere on your person... between arse cheeks may work. Practise getting them out and doing it with your back to someone until youve got it nailed and you should be fine. There are several tutorials i came across on the net, ill try and find one for you now.
Best of luck, I hate to think of someone going to jail for smoking a bit of harmless ganj.

 

[Les Doodess]

Good luck tomorrow brother.