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I want to tell someone I smoke, but I wimp out.

Alyssa88

New Member
Ok, so I have this really good friend, the kind you have benefits with, lol.

Anyway, I really want to bring weed to bed with us. I don't know how to ask him or bring it up. I keep looking around his apartment for signs of use but haven't found anything (only a surface snoop though, no digging or opening anything), however I do still have this strong instinct telling me he smokes, at least occasionally.

First, he mentioned he had a friend who smokes weed. I think he was saying it to see how I would respond. I didn't respond in an either positive or negative way, as it just kind of seems normal to me and I was listening for the rest of the story.

Second, he asked me once if I smoked. Normally, I would admit it to people, but this guy is also my co-worker (and kind of a superior). I was drunk at the time and simply responded with "smoke what?". He inquired more but I changed the subject- but the way he was smiling tells me he is at least probably OK with it.

Then there are just little things. Like he traveled to New York to go to some Jamaican festival. I may just be stereotyping but I think of weed when I think of Jamaica. He was texting me while he was there one night and seemed a bit off, kind of similar to myself when high. I sent a text asking him if he was smoking and he never responded to that question, kind of walked around it.

I think we both do but we are both terrified that it could fuck us up at work. Like if something would happen between us I think there is a common fear that tattling could be revenge or at least blackmail. I know I don't tend to trust people at all, but I really want to smoke with him.

I have wanted to bring it up so many times but I keeping wimping out. I am so afraid, but I don't really think I logically have much to fear. I don't think he'd ever screw me over, but I have been screwed over by much closer people. You never know.

Should I just come out and ask or just casually bring it up? Did you ever feel close enough to a co-worker to admit to use? How did you bring it up to co-workers and/or the people you are "with"?

Should I just not bring it up and accept that I can't have it the way I want because he is also a co-worker?

Ughh . . . boys.
 

richgannon_2001

New Member
as long as you arent high at work it doesnt matter what happens off company time and anything you do with your free time isnt their business and should be kept that way, if i were you id just rent a funny movie with him one night and ask him if he wants to smoke cuz you really wanna smoke a joint b4 you watch it and go from there.
 

LaidBackinCali

New Member
throw in some hints, If you say something to someone who smokes, a persoon who does will know, a person who doesnt won't know what your talkin about. Ask him if he likes funny movies like Half baked, (weed movies preferably) etc. ask him what he thinks of Medical Marijuana laws? there are different angles you can take, we are happy to help you, Good luck!
 

FreakNature

New Member
I feel for ya'. It's an age old problem because of the ridiculous draconian laws. I would be hesitant for all of the same reasons you listed. You might approach is as if you don't smoke but have been thinking about it. Maybe he has some information or experience that can help you make the decision. :) It's kind of deceitful, but you already have that going on. But you still have to fall back on "what if" something goes wrong...and the blackmail thing...sucks.
 
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DoItToIt

New Member
How about invite him over sometime and leave a piece on your desk. See what he thinks when he walks in, if it's going to be a problem put it away and never speak of it again. Or if it's the way it should be he'll be like "Let's twack that real quick..." :roorrip:
 

BadBradBlu

New Member
Sweet idea to share an experience with someone you care about!

To be honest I would NEVER tell anyone at work that I smoke or even talk about it as they all seem pretty stiff and once my superior blatantly said 'I don't like weed at all' - I think he saw 420Mag opened on my desktop while I was in the loo but it did'nt go any further. I have'nt had this problem with partners though - I will always light up before I sleep and if someone else is in my bed I will smoke in front of them with no hesitation - never have I had a bad reaction and only one 'friend' that did'nt smoke with me but was cool with it - many times I have and I LOVE breaking someones MJ virginity (and once or twice both kinds at once) anyway...

I say just act dumb (one girl did this to me and I found it adorable!) and say "have you ever smoked weed? I have always wondered what it would be like... especially before sex..."(she was already an undercover stoner as I discovered shortly afterward!) :yummy:
 
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Mr Spliff

New Member
Maybe light up a joint shortly before he's due to arrive at yours.... (just to get the smell in the air, not to get stoned before he arrives lol).....then see if he mentions the smell and take it from there.
If he reacts in a negative way then just blame it on a friend that recently left.
Good luck!
 
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kittykiwi

New Member
man....these are all great ideas. You know where I'm from gettin with a co-worker...friends with benefits would get you in as much trouble as the weed thing. I wd try lighting up to have the smell in there b4 he comes and leave a piece out or something just see what he says. but...I do have to say...enjoy your life it's your one and only don't live by someone else's standards. Just my opinion on this...good luck:)
 

Alyssa88

New Member
These are all excellent ideas!! I don't know which one to choose but I definitely have to do this.

I really think he'd understand, plus I have plenty of stuff against him, lol.
 

melly_mel

New Member
honesty is the key !

if smoking is something you enjoy there's no reason why you should even second guess urself when dealing with a boyfriend or even someone you spend quality time with. even if he doesnt care to smoke, its one less stress u have to deal with...

im a very blunt person, so i would probably just ask him straight out.. haha.. maybe not the ideal way of going about it but it is the easiest way in my eyes...

there's alot of good ideas people posted so im sure outa all of em theres one suggestion that fits you :]

so good luck and hopefully you two can enjoy the magic of herbicals together :D
 

DaHui

New Member
Just be honest and up front about what you do, like and believe in. You'll figure the rest out once that is out in the open.
 

VAGUEtrain

New Member
as long as you arent high at work it doesnt matter what happens off company time and anything you do with your free time isnt their business and should be kept that way, if i were you id just rent a funny movie with him one night and ask him if he wants to smoke cuz you really wanna smoke a joint b4 you watch it and go from there.

too true rich, unfortunatly you can get fired for being tested after an injury, even if you werent high at work, if u get injured, better do some quick detoxxing.
 

xscape321

New Member
just be honest, I 'thought' adults smoking weed was dumb and immature however about 3 months ago my gf told me that she is a heavy puffer and I honestly don't have a problem with it ( I even join about twice a week)
 

Be Irie

Nug of the Year: 2009 - Plant of the Month: Aug & Sept 2008, Dec 2008, Jan 2009 - Member of the Month: Feb 2009 - Nug of the Month: May 2008, Jan & Feb 2009, Nov 2012
ask him if he knows what "420" means.... Thats what my GF did to me....I would never date a coworker though, specially not a superior....
 

Alyssa88

New Member
I told him. I just kind of came out with it and asked before sex, lol.


He doesn't smoke though . . . yet. He hasn't even tried it!! Give me some time, I am sure he will want some.

He is cool with it, his best friend is a pot head and smokes in front of him all the time. I am sure he won't mind me bringing it into bed :rasta:

He won't tell anyone at work, and even if he did I don't hink they'd believe him. They think the sun shines out of my ass. He knows that they love me more than him, haha.
 
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