Ok, so I have this really good friend, the kind you have benefits with, lol.
Anyway, I really want to bring weed to bed with us. I don't know how to ask him or bring it up. I keep looking around his apartment for signs of use but haven't found anything (only a surface snoop though, no digging or opening anything), however I do still have this strong instinct telling me he smokes, at least occasionally.
First, he mentioned he had a friend who smokes weed. I think he was saying it to see how I would respond. I didn't respond in an either positive or negative way, as it just kind of seems normal to me and I was listening for the rest of the story.
Second, he asked me once if I smoked. Normally, I would admit it to people, but this guy is also my co-worker (and kind of a superior). I was drunk at the time and simply responded with "smoke what?". He inquired more but I changed the subject- but the way he was smiling tells me he is at least probably OK with it.
Then there are just little things. Like he traveled to New York to go to some Jamaican festival. I may just be stereotyping but I think of weed when I think of Jamaica. He was texting me while he was there one night and seemed a bit off, kind of similar to myself when high. I sent a text asking him if he was smoking and he never responded to that question, kind of walked around it.
I think we both do but we are both terrified that it could fuck us up at work. Like if something would happen between us I think there is a common fear that tattling could be revenge or at least blackmail. I know I don't tend to trust people at all, but I really want to smoke with him.
I have wanted to bring it up so many times but I keeping wimping out. I am so afraid, but I don't really think I logically have much to fear. I don't think he'd ever screw me over, but I have been screwed over by much closer people. You never know.
Should I just come out and ask or just casually bring it up? Did you ever feel close enough to a co-worker to admit to use? How did you bring it up to co-workers and/or the people you are "with"?
Should I just not bring it up and accept that I can't have it the way I want because he is also a co-worker?
Ughh . . . boys.
Anyway, I really want to bring weed to bed with us. I don't know how to ask him or bring it up. I keep looking around his apartment for signs of use but haven't found anything (only a surface snoop though, no digging or opening anything), however I do still have this strong instinct telling me he smokes, at least occasionally.
First, he mentioned he had a friend who smokes weed. I think he was saying it to see how I would respond. I didn't respond in an either positive or negative way, as it just kind of seems normal to me and I was listening for the rest of the story.
Second, he asked me once if I smoked. Normally, I would admit it to people, but this guy is also my co-worker (and kind of a superior). I was drunk at the time and simply responded with "smoke what?". He inquired more but I changed the subject- but the way he was smiling tells me he is at least probably OK with it.
Then there are just little things. Like he traveled to New York to go to some Jamaican festival. I may just be stereotyping but I think of weed when I think of Jamaica. He was texting me while he was there one night and seemed a bit off, kind of similar to myself when high. I sent a text asking him if he was smoking and he never responded to that question, kind of walked around it.
I think we both do but we are both terrified that it could fuck us up at work. Like if something would happen between us I think there is a common fear that tattling could be revenge or at least blackmail. I know I don't tend to trust people at all, but I really want to smoke with him.
I have wanted to bring it up so many times but I keeping wimping out. I am so afraid, but I don't really think I logically have much to fear. I don't think he'd ever screw me over, but I have been screwed over by much closer people. You never know.
Should I just come out and ask or just casually bring it up? Did you ever feel close enough to a co-worker to admit to use? How did you bring it up to co-workers and/or the people you are "with"?
Should I just not bring it up and accept that I can't have it the way I want because he is also a co-worker?
Ughh . . . boys.
It's kind of deceitful, but you already have that going on. But you still have to fall back on "what if" something goes wrong...and the blackmail thing...sucks.
