How do I pass a random drug screen tomorrow?

[PINKIEQUINN]

Firstly, I smoked on Sunday 4/5/15 I hit it twice. Then I smoked the roach in a bowl yesterday. It was only a pinch. But because I hadn't smoked in forever (8 months) it was enough. I'm on probation and I made the stupid decision to run the risk of getting called for a random. Well... I got called, and I have to go in tomorrow.

That being said I'm 110. 5'0", I really need to pass this and substitution is not an option. They watch closely.

If you're going to recommend subbing please tell me how you'd do it as a female. I've been practicing in the bathroom.... On my second cup of coffee and second liter of water....

please don't tell me I shouldn't have or I will fail. Looking for only optimistic/helpful answers.

NEVER DOING THIS AGAIN. HOLY CRAP. THE STRESS.

I smoke a pack of cigarettes a day, so if you say exercise please keep in mind: I FEEL LIKE IM DYING. I ran down the street and back.

 

[PINKIEQUINN]

*desperately refreshes page for replies* I'm stressing out so bad about this.

 

[Bapple]

Try to calm down....I know it's stressful, but generally in life, she who controls herself controls the situation. Some one posted in your other thread (beateo I think)' and he suggested a shard of soap under your fingernail to corrupt the sample. I don't know anything about drug tests, but if soap really works, then as a lady, I think you could soap up your lady parts liberally before the test and when you pee, soap will get into the sample as the stream goes into the container.

The more calm and unconcerned you appear at the test place, the less likely they are to really zone in on you.... (I hope) be lucky and take care.....

 

[PINKIEQUINN]

Does soap really work? It's not being sent off to a lab, its a dipstick test

 

[Weed420]

Does soap really work? It's not being sent off to a lab, its a dipstick test

Just do dilution the morning of the test.Your THC metbabolite levels should be fairly low with the small amount you've smoked so dilution should pass the piss test.
Drink 36 ounces of gatorade the morning of the test
Pee 3 or 4 times before the test
When taking the test
Pee a little in the toilet first
Pee 2 ounces in the collection cup
Pee the rest in the toilet.

The reasons.
80% of your thc metabolites are removed through your stool. If the stool isn't evacuated the thc metabolites gets reabsorbed through your intestines and heads back to fat cells again. When you change to a red meat high fat diet it does 2 things. It raises your creatine levels to allow for more dillution so that you don't fail the test. The fat tells the body to start saving fat cells again for a few days so that the thc metabolites don't enter the kidneys and liver and pass into the urine.

Midstream pee
The first and last of your pee is always the dirtiest. So use your midstream urine for the collection cup

 

[PINKIEQUINN]

I have azo cranberry, cranberry juice (not cocktail, 100% juice, no sugar added) and water... lots of water.

Would this be enough? Am I taking too many precautions?

 

[PINKIEQUINN]

Sigh

 

[Fredmahoney]

Our random drug test solutions are intended to issue you true serenity when you are grinding away and are liable to an irregular medication test. They uproot all undesirable poisons and are totally imperceptible.