I Got The Job!

[DooberDogger]

So I recently applied for the job of my dreams, interview went great, and they called me back to tell me basically I got the job. The only problem was before I started, they said it was company policy to do a drug test, but I'm a habitual smoker in a legal state... I had never gone from happy to terrified so quickly. I hadn't been expecting this because neither of my last jobs had required tests, but this company is a huge national company with lots of departments, and i guess it's just standard.

After a week of stressing, chugging cranberry juice and popping niacin i was still pissing dirty on every home drug test so i said fuck it and bought some U pass synthetic urine. I was pretty nervous about smuggling it in/temperature etc. but i found out it comes with a little hand warmer to keep the bottle the right temperature so i felt alot more confident.... Long story short... IT WORKED. Just got the call, I START MONDAY!!! Also fuck mandatory drug testing in legalized states.

 

[Blew Hiller]

Also fuck mandatory drug testing in legalized states.

Amen.

 

[Mark Gordan Smith]

Nice one.

 

[Captain goodvibes]

i cant work this out. Urine drug testing tests for the by product of cannabis use in your system, not actual THC. It is only indicating if you have used cannabis recently, not if you are currently affected. If use is legal in your state how can they possibly make this fly.

 

[Emilya Green]

Certain jobs are always going to require testing, no matter what state you live in. Truck drivers for example, need to be randomly tested. How would you feel if your airline pilot was high? We do need better testing, but for now we have to do what we must to stay safe. I refused the company's policy on testing, but it turned out to be quite a legal battle. I had to prove that my job and whether or not I was under a slight influence from something done days ago was never going to present a danger to my fellow employees and I had to put it in writing that my involvement in and around the cannabis world was actually part of my job. I have promised not to imbibe during working hours, on company property. They have no test that can check my compliance. It took a few years, but even the boss has stopped sniffing at me when he thinks I am not noticing.

 

[Captain goodvibes]

My point is this, urine testing doesnt detect if you are "high", it detects if you have used cannabis within a time frame of around 21 days for most people. Saliva testing is a much more accurate predictor of recent cannabis use which is why it is used in roadside drug tests. Sounds like a win for anyone who wanted to mount a legal challenge to me.