misunderstood

Ziggyspliff

New Member
hi everyone,

thank you for letting me join your community, i am in a medicinal state....i am mentally disabled but we aren't that far along yet with the causes you can get mmj for...i am also schizophrenic but have smoked since i was 12 with no problems other then if i smoke too much swag (which sometimes is all i can afford) i get stressed i can't deal so i have done whatever i had to..just to afford marijuana so the craziness in my head will go away for a couple of hrs (anxiety,bi-polar,stress,anger and being overly emotional) i was married for 5 years and i went outside one day to smoke a bowl cuz my ex wife is a bitch and i walked around the outside of the house i sparked my bowl and got a little paranoid so i looked in my apartment window to find my wife making out with my best friend since i was two...safe to say i freaking EXPLODED i ran back inside and beat the shit out of him and freaked out even more then i was too much of a coward to leave her so i stayed with her another month or so an pretty much watched her fuck my best friend for that time, i was going to lose it again i was going to kill myself an idk what i would of done before that probaly done something worse...instead i woke her fat nasty ass up and grew my balls back and told her that i was leaving her stupid ass and i wasn't coming back. so i ended up living back at my parents and had no money so i got some money (like i said any way i could) and started moving some pot around my town and then i stopped doing that cuz i couldn't take the stress of dealing with annoying customers (no offense people i love my fellow potheads but when they bitch bitch bitch bout every detail) i then got involved in even crazier shit to afford my mental health meds because of my divorce i couldn't afford 648 dollars for 30 day supply of even one of my meds even though i have like 4 meds i take (anti-psychotics,mood stabilizers, benzos, and bi-polar depression meds) but long story shit i got arrested for violation of restraining order for walking by my old apartment where my bitch ex wife just so happened to be getting her shit out of the apartment when she didn't even live there....i saw my ex father in law an i said hi I'm sorry for the way things ended with me an your daughter an i still love you guys an will help with any bills left over from the apartment lease ending mid lease....he then said I'm going to call the cops so i ran away, i get back to my parents house an before ik it about 10 cop cars come pouring down my street cuz my father in law told them i had a gun (it was a bb gun and it was in my car) i wasn't even near it! so i get arrested with criminal possession of marijuana (18 grams) and criminal contempt (for violating the order of protection) all i wanted to do is show them I'm not the scum bag their daughter was painting me out to be.....ik this is a huge story and i thank anyone who reads it, I'm just really in need of fellow friends to help me out in this time cause i can't smoke or use any bud for awhile now cuz I'm going through mental health court its always in my mind and my heart and I'm studying horticulture cuz i wanna be farmer someday to help other people like myself with disabilities or cancer (which i watched eat my grandparents in less then a year in a half) or any illness cannabis can help...my name is ziggy i am a stoner...i am misunderstood
 
Welcome Ziggy We are all misunderstood at times[been where you have been and got back on the right track] as long as one is alive there is hope its hard to leave the anger and what not aside and move on but it is in your best interest it will help put you at peace with yourself peace out for now any thing you need is here for the asking
 
Omg these replies were enough to get me through another day thank you all so much, I'd love some gardening tips from anyone willing to help I got a very small garden going on like with a single resident and it's not something I can exactly talk to my mom bout (seeming as she's conservative,christian, and thinks I'm a addict) but the only gardener ik. I got some afghan in a pot with happy frog soil and Ummm a 3 in one food called bio thrive just started it yesterday but my true leaves are starting to come out. I did this a while ago and I don't remember how skinny the base of the plant was but it kind of concerns me because I don't want my plant to die the seeds were quite costly, it's insane what the Europeans know they can get out of us for this shit lol.....it's been bout a week an a half and the plant is about 2 inches tall. I'm using a 1050 lumens light for now till I can figure out what to do security wise about the glowing cause unfortunately my land lord is a dick and I'm broke.....I'm planning on when i flower to do the 12/12 cycle I'm just really hoping this thing doesn't die oh well I got 9 more chances....thanks for any feed back
 
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