Your stoner quotes

Re: Your stoner quotes.

Not a quote but lately I've been singing that song
by AfroMan "colt 45 and 2 zig zags" all day long.
A co-worker asked me, "what did you say?"
All I could do was laugh and say to myself
he just wouldn't understand. :grinjoint:
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

Was really stoned one time when my friend was driving us down the street. There was an extremely tall man walking on the sidewalk and I looked over at her and said "whoa that guy is really high"
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

"im so high i taught myself how to speak parsletongue (harry potter snake talk) not the cool shit but i can say basic stuff like "yo what up" and "open the chamber of secrets" ya that type of stuff"

"dude u were gone for 45 mins where the hell did u go?"
"well....i went upstairs and got lost in ur kitchen; then walked around the islan din circles looking in every drawer and cabinet for juice"
"juice is in the fridge...."
"oh the cabinet that was cold gotcha brb"
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

"I was trippin' in the shower for about a half an hour. I don't know if I'm gonna make it."
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

apparently when i was high and drinking (not too much so i figure its mostly the bud)

i had a 2 hours convo wiht a friends cat that was just chilling on my lap

and my boi was like "yo lets go twist one"

me "tiger wtf why are u asking me for buds"

him "dude....ur talking ot the cat again just give me the buds well roll one"

me " tiger...i know u dont smoke pot ur just stealing it from me"

and for the rest of the night i refused to smoke and or provide my buds to smoke cuz i thought the cat was just using me for buds
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

puffinsmuggle said:
"well....i went upstairs and got lost in ur kitchen; then walked around the islan din circles looking in every drawer and cabinet for juice"
"juice is in the fridge...."
"oh the cabinet that was cold gotcha brb"
Click to expand...

RotFLMFAO you just gave me stoner flashbacks to the first time I ever smoked top shelf bud with this couple way back in the '80s (there has always been killer bud - only now, more people know how to grow it). We smoked a nice one in their living room and within minutes the guy was wandering around his house. He eventually disappeared. Some time after that I was looking for him and walked back into their kitchen. Their refrigerator was in the right-hand corner as I walked in and so it might perhaps be understood that the first couple of times I looked in the kitchen I didn't notice that the guy was like packed into the little bit of space on top of the fridge!

That's all, just happened to remember. I'd put this post on-topic by mentioning something witty (or at least funny) that was said that night but for some reason all I can remember is the guy hiding in his kitchen for no apparent reason and the fact that his GF would NOT leave me alone.

That and that the herb was really nice.

Hey, that'll work lol: "There has always been killer bud - only now, more people know how to grow it."
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

haha we had cali sup silver haze interesting stuff had a 5 yr stoner smoke only .3 of it drive a bit then stop the car and tell me he is too high to operate said car and that he was made a bitch cuz out of nowhere he was high and blitzed off his mind
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

LMAO some of those r hillarious!

me and my m8s tho play the BING-BONG game if ne 1 has heard of it. whos ever rackeing bongs wil shout out BING n the 1st voice to react and say bk BONG is the nxt one... all sorts of various name games have sprung up since.
But the one of the funniest things iv heard was when i was smoking with my buddy Jake we had just been nailing a nice half oz wen he goes to stand up his legs give way and hes on the floor in a heap, looks up at me and goes 'Dude i think am stoned' lol u had to be there, but it was pricless.

Toke on all :roorrip:

:peace:
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

amber smells said:
i'd sell you my car for a bag of gummy bears! lol




:slide:
Click to expand...

And it would be worth it.

"Dude, i like to believe that all animals, including ourselves are secretly controlled by small creatures of descriptions.."

Haha, and..

"Dude, i wonder if all this weed smoke i'm blowin' out is gettin' these plants high"
"If these plants are high, imagine what weed plants are.."
"We're not getting high.. were getting weed then!"
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

I smoked out fourth of july
and I thought I was in a war with North Korea

then I started watching Valkyrie on Blue-Ray
and I started telling my cousin "This isn't how life looks like, its not all shiny and shit. I think regular t.v thats real life!"

Idk I'm the type of stoner that has those great stoner Ideas
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

"Dude, animals are stupid.."

"Dude, the chipsssssssss are soooooo good, but i'm tired as, can i sleep anywhere?"
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

Some lovely jems from myself and friends one night......

"can you turn off the light..."
"why don't you turn it off your sitting next to it..."
"I forgot i had legs!"

"I bet you're not as high as i am motherfucker!"

"Where the bowl at?"
"In my shoe....."

"YOU DOPEFIEND!"

"H....I....G....H... It's like a song"

"I wish i didn't have a stomach right now.. like i wish it was over here and i was over there....."

"If this was Michael Jacksons house this would be never never land!"

"Whoa you just said a bunch or words like fast"


"you looked like you but not like you..."

"Oh my god i can't breath is that bad?"





and the one that gets said to me daily....



"You going to smoke that?"


:peace: :bigtoke:
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

me-"we need to push these couches together."
my friend-"what, why?"
me-"dont fucking ask why! its what we do"

"please forgive me san antonio for i have cheated on you with a pickle named flamboyant"

last night i was at a friends house and we were supposed to wait until our other friends got there to smoke but we decided we would smoke just a little. so our friends pull up and of course we're too high but we're still trying to act straight and no joke as soon as my friends get out of the car i witness this conversation:
friend1(just pulled up)- "hey... you guys are acting kinda funny did you smoke?"
friend2(supposed to be hiding the fact that we just smoked)- "pshh no of course not. we just smoked some cigarettes. and some weed. mostly weed"
i truly had no clue what to say. we all just stood there completely silent.

those are all i can think of for now
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

Me and two buddies were having a session and Jeff looks at me and says, "Im so baked"... Chris says "Jeff.. Open your eyes!!"...I looked at Jeff and said, "Dude... I could blind fold you with dental floss!!!" It wouldn't be so funny except Jeff is Korean and his eyes were normally squinty!! After this particular session his eyes were closed as far as Im concerned but he swore he could see!! We all laughed for hours!!

:peace:
 
My stoner quotes.

Me and my fiance were sitting in our sun room baked out of our brain, when she says, "I forgot to get my purse out of the kitchen. Shit! I'll go when I remember again!!!" When we got through laughing, I wrote that saying down, cuz I was worried about forgetting it.
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

Note: a bildo is our word for a bong.

"Dude, where the bildos at?"
"I dunno dude, billietown?"
"I GOT A BUS PASS.."
"Where to dude?"
"Billytown.."

"I'm a billysaurus rex!"
 

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