Things you should not do stoned!

Kushboi said:
I dont know if you should do wen your stoned or not but im Maad stoned right now & im thinking wot i eva i did i thought was right is now wrong Lol! i dno ... :)
Click to expand...

Translation:

I dont know if you should do it when you are stoned or not, but I am mad stoned right now. I think that what ever I did while stoned was right, but now I realize that it is wrong!
 
Absolute true story....My brother and I were returning from a Grateful Dead concert at the Iowa State Fairgroundsin the spring of 1973. Needless to say we were experiencing dimensions of stonedness that can only be experienced at a Dead concert. We had rolled a bunch of joints and filled a Newport cigarette package with them so we wouldn't have to screw around rolling at the concert. Anyway after the concert we heading down the highway when my brother says "Shit!" The highway patrol was lit up right behind us. Of course we were puffing away so my brother eats the joint he's holding and like a dumbass I throw the three remaining joints in the newport pack out the window. This is where it gets crazy, the cop walks up to the window and goes through his routine about speeding, blah blah blah and then gives my brother a speeding ticket. Then he tells us to get out of the car!
I am sure we are busted when he says..."You two have 5 minutes to pick up all the trash you see between here and the cigarette pack you threw out window" I asked how he knew it was a cigarette pack? He said it bounced off the window of his cruiser and littering was a $500.00 fine. So we scrambled around picking up trash to include the Newport pack which was right there on the side of the road about 100 ft behind the cop car with the three intact joints still inside. We both dumped two armloads of trash in the trunk of the car (the Newport pack was on the bottom of the trash pile). The cop lectured us a little bit longer but became friendly when I told him I was leaving for basic training in July. We drove down the road for an hour before we had the nerve to stop and retrieve the Newport pack and light up again.
 
This is some funny stuff. I have a short story.

Next story goes a little like this. I got home from school and took a couple bong rips before I went to work that day. I'm telling, the OG x Trainwreck had me feeling like I couldn't walk. I trudged onward to work any way. I work at an antique restoration building so therefore, I work with many chemicals. I don't normally wear a respirator because there's a giant ventilation fan where I normally work on furniture. I was working on a very nice looking bench. For some reason, the fan seemed a little louder
than normal but since I was so baked I started to vibe with it. Suddenly, I started hearing some noise of some sort; like someone was talking to me. My boss was the only other person there but he was outside so it had to have been type of audio hallucination. Must have had my face too close to the fumes.
 
Im high so im gonna rap . when i sober up im gonna see how retarded it is lol
coming back from a nap
off of some zanax
when im done and to help me relax
syke nah i dont play that shit
i roll spliffs
of only the finest
weed i can hit
but when i change the flo of the dro you know
doing puff puff pass and gasp my bro
that the change is is a rearrangement
of estranged proportions of lanes switched
in our minds got the time to make rhymes
bust out dimes then we chime in our words
like 2003rd words are heard
slurred and spurt hurt words out to the nerds
so hit up a bong and play along
help me sing some of this weed song
 
branson111190 said:
Im high so im gonna rap . when i sober up im gonna see how retarded it is lol
coming back from a nap
off of some zanax
when im done and to help me relax
syke nah i dont play that shit
i roll spliffs
of only the finest
weed i can hit
but when i change the flo of the dro you know
doing puff puff pass and gasp my bro
that the change is is a rearrangement
of estranged proportions of lanes switched
in our minds got the time to make rhymes
bust out dimes then we chime in our words
like 2003rd words are heard
slurred and spurt hurt words out to the nerds
so hit up a bong and play along
help me sing some of this weed song
Click to expand...

That was sick, let's read some more! :rofl:
 
Once while toking, me and some mates decided to "shave" our armpits with a lighter and a spray deoderant. was pretty funny when they did it. my mate who "shaved" me accidently (cause he was totallyt baked) held the button on the deoderant for too long, engulfing me in flames. i woke up with 2. degree burns in my armpit and was missing eyelid hair on one eye and 1.5 eye brow. and my hair was lightly singed......there was only one thing to do. wake and bake ;)
 
Re: Things you should not do stoned!

Your girlfriends' mother, back in 1979..........

WillyB

:yikes:
 
Drive an intercooled Turbo Regal in light snow at over .00000001mph.

WillyBudz said:
Re: Things you should not do stoned!

Your girlfriends' mother, back in 1979..........

WillyB

:yikes:
Click to expand...

But... she was younger then, lol.
 
LOL this is a funny post. A few weeks ago I go to the waffel house at 3am after getting baked and had no food in the house. I get there and order my food to go. I pay and go to the car, put the food on the roof of the car so I can dig my keys out of my pocket. Jump in the car and take off. When I hit the brakes to head out the parking lot, food falls onto the windshild. I get out to clean it off and look back at the waffel house and the people inside were all watching me laughing. Drove back into the parking spot and went back inside and ordered more food. lol I was so embarrased but even more hungry.
 
I feel you do as many different things as you can when your high.Yesterday afternoon I did a bowl in my Iolte and then drove 60 some miles to this festival after about 2 hours it started to rain. Had made sure to bring along my Iolite did it for the ride home. I also have a GPS made a bad turn and got stuck in this loop it resolved itself after 1/2 hr. or so when I got home smoked another bowl and pondered what an awsome time I had.Good thing the GPS doesn't get high.
 

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