SoilGirl's Indoor Organic Soil Medical Grow Journal - Mars II 1600 & Other LEDs

[colorfuldayze]

All the best to you and your family SoilGirl. Happy Christmas and merry New Year!

 

[SweetSue]

Merry Christmas SoilGirl.

I know you're enjoying the love of your family. Have a wonderful celebration. I'm so glad we met.

 

[SoilGirl]

Aw thanks so much everyone! I hope everyone has been having a wonderful Christmas Eve!!! I've been spending it with my family, we drove around town looking at the lights, set up our tree finally, and watched old Christmas movies that we've seen a hundred times. Not bad at all

I also have a lot of news as far as the grow but that can wait. I'll probably do a big update tomorrow somewhere between having a classic X-mas morning and a family dinner during the lazy imbetween time haha.

Sounds like it'll be a perfect day to me, who needs fancy presents? Until tomorrow...

Merry Christmas 420 Friends!!

Goodnight!! (And good morning for my friends across the pond!)

 

[SweetSue]

When we were raising our children we instituted a $200 limit for the entire celebration, gifts, feast, decorations, all of it. That meant very few presents, which I think worked out quite well in the end. I always wanted it to be about so much more than gifts under the tree. After all these years we actually prefer it. The packages under my tree are purely for decoration of the trolley layout.

In the end it's the love of family that matters most. We had a falling out with our intolerant daughter-in-law this year and she and our son took our grandchildren away as a result of it. It drives home the value of family. Grab all the hugs you can SoilGirl. Life can be capricious. Love hard today. I know it's in your nature.

 

[Marzbadrock]

Just dropping by to say Happy Holidays to all!

 

[Teddy Edwards]

Peace be with you, SoilGirl. Trust you're having a most excellent day.

 

[SoilGirl]

Good to see SoilGirl. You won't regret it. This is basically what I did, but on a smaller scale (I used smaller containers that would fit under the sink and only ordered a pound of worms). Now I'm putting together the Geo Pot worm bin with leaves to see how quickly they'll make leaf mold vermicompost.

I've come to believe the worms are the real treasure when you're gardening with LOS.

I love your style Sue I'm wondering whether or not I should actually use that LOS soil I was cooking as LOS soil, or just let it be a worm bin for me while I'm waiting for new tubs with lids. I feel so stupid for ordering those bins. They WERE advertised as sold with lids... and I've been talking to the seller (don't ever order anything from a seller called "Shoplet" - worst customer service humanly possible.) but they couldn't care less. It took 3 emails to get them to get me a return label. I only ordered 18 gallon bins because I didn't think the 8 gallon ones at walmart would cut it for all my plants, - and the bigger ones didn't have lids!!! GOD!!!!

I just want a big worm bin for Christmas darnit!!

When we were raising our children we instituted a $200 limit for the entire celebration, gifts, feast, decorations, all of it. That meant very few presents, which I think worked out quite well in the end. I always wanted it to be about so much more than gifts under the tree. After all these years we actually prefer it. The packages under my tree are purely for decoration of the trolley layout.

In the end it's the love of family that matters most. We had a falling out with our intolerant daughter-in-law this year and she and our son took our grandchildren away as a result of it. It drives home the value of family. Grab all the hugs you can SoilGirl. Life can be capricious. Love hard today. I know it's in your nature.

I think that sounds like a just right Christmas plan Sue - we tend to spend more money on the feast than the presents. We had the most amazing Prime Rib tonight... The presents I got today were a pair of furry slippers - and my mom freaking rocks lol - she found a 5 pound box of Kelp Meal for me, god knows where. Together they were probably between 20-30$ I made peanut brittle for my dad - he couldn't have been happier lol. I got my sister some nail polish, and my mom just wanted to not have to clean up after dinner LOL. She asked for that weeks ago.

We never have big Christmas presents lol. I think my biggest one was a bike when I turned 9 or 10 ...something always comes up during the year. I got a new laptop this year - which was the best gift I could get, the gift of 420 magazine .... whenever we get something even a little expensive (like, 60 bucks or higher) we just accept that its probably our birthday and Xmas presents.

About your daughter in law and grandchildren... I'm so sorry about that. That must be so hard.. Thank you for the advice Sue. I will definitely value this time with my family while I have it, its rare that we're together like this nowadays.

Merry Christmas SoilGirl.

I know you're enjoying the love of your family. Have a wonderful celebration. I'm so glad we met.

Merry Christmas Girl
I hope its a good one for you

Merry Xmas to all

'
And keep up the good work SoulGirl...

Merry Christmas soilgirl!

Happy Christmas Soilgirl...

All the best to you and your family SoilGirl. Happy Christmas and merry New Year!

Just dropping by to say Happy Holidays to all!

Peace be with you, SoilGirl. Trust you're having a most excellent day.

Everyone, (I'm sorry to do a multi-response on X-mas, but I'm pretty worn out and I have an update to get to!) Thank You so much! And I hope this Christmas day treated everyone as well as it did me! I'm so glad I joined 420 magazine and got to meet each one of you wonderful people this year! You've changed my life for the better during a time of my life that can be hard.

 

[SoilGirl]

Christmas Update!

Hi guys, my mom and I were doing lots of work in the grow room today. Some news:

All clones are showing roots except Red Cherry Berry and Blue Blood. Finally!

Also, my Mom and I swept out both grow rooms, mixed about 20 gallons of veg soil, opened up all the new growth tips together, and re-arranged my grow rooms. We were busy for hours haha. It's wonderful to have all that done. I can procrastinate pretty badly sometimes >.< Thank god for my mom.

And I'm going to switch to flowering tomorrow for the 4 under the Mars II. Those 4 also were transplanted into 6 gallon containers of fresh cooked flowering soil today. Except CK#2. That one got a 4 and a half gallon container because its what was empty. Transplant went fine with my mom's help, no signs of stress, and right after that, I planted some living mulch seeds in their new homes. The mix I got was the 12 seed top cover mix from buildasoil; the one that's mostly clover. So excited to see those sprout.

I also moved the two Diesel clones into soil today... I waited too long for that haha, they were too well rooted, they're a bit nitrogen deficient now. Oh well. the new soil will fix that in no time.

By the way here's my new T5 all set up - except one bulb was fricken out when it got here. -.- very annoying, but a new one is on the way because that seller knows the importance of quality customer service.
- this light is noticeably brighter than the Milliard t5 that doesn't have a ballast. I wish I'd have waited on the Milliard one until now, but then my plants wouldn't be very well vegged. Oh well. It uses less energy which also can be a perk.

and since my Camera still only can take 8 pics at a time........ haha we're only going to look at BBK and CK#1 closely today. We'll look at the others soon. I'm done in that grow room for one day.

Black Bubba Kush Mini Flux

About 4-6 inches vertical, thick branched, split down the middle now >.< .... I haven't replaced any restraints since the transplant... gonna see what LA thinks about it all tomorrow. We'll see what's next for it then.

Corleone Kush #1 - 'The Semi-Fluxed'

The foliage is starting to be a bother. It's gone vertical maybe 3 inches, but grew outwards a bit more also. Not as much vert as I'd like..

also going to see what LA says.... probably, "Off with the fans already Girl!!" ..... these nodes also ended up a little more tightly packed than I planned but, hey plans don't always work... Oh well. My yield will definitely be something more serious than last chop - thats for sure!

Hahaha like my new furry slippers? What else could a girl want for Christmas?

...

Oh wait, I forgot to share my favorite bit of today, after dinner and all that work in the grow room my Mom, Dad and I all went and vaporized the last of my BBK like crazy in my room and watched parts of the movie "The Wall" together. (Yep, the animated parts ) We were giggling and just having fun... Loki (our stoner dog) also joined in, lol whenever he sees us sitting by the vape he gets especially in our faces he french kissed my dad when he was trying to hold in his hit and made my dad cough it out. Loki was just waiting for that, he laps at vapor and inhales it through his nose, and then he rolls around and waves his paws in the air like some hog-dog hybrid lmao. I love that crazy dog so much.

Hahaha here was our favorite nug, the last BBK nug of this most recent chop. Not the best pic, but at least you can see this one is pretty big (compared to the others)

I really hope you all had a great Christmas! Time for a new year now!

 

[colorfuldayze]

Great update StonerGirl Woof Loki - like him a lot And nice furry slippers I might add. Awesome that the family enjoys the greatest gifts of the greatest plant on Christmas day. Looks like you were busy today SG, well done. Thanks for the awesome update and for sharing your efforts. All good things to you and your family - cheers!

 

[Marzbadrock]

Awesome as usual.

 

[Teddy Edwards]

I have my traditional Boxing Day slight headache and feeling rather bleary. Can't imagine why. So I'll keep this short - top update as usual SG. Girls are looking super. I went to 12/12 on Christmas Eve, so I'm very happy that you're switching today too. Now, more coffee, more coffee....

 

[SweetSue]

I love the way they've responded to your training SoilGirl. Everyone looks fabulous, and you're right, the soil will take care of the Diesel clones. In two weeks they'll look as fabulous as their healthy cousins.

Your Christmas sounds delightful. Now THAT'S a mom! What a perfect gift for a talented indoor gardener. You can keep the slippers. I'm a barefoot gal myself. As soon as I cross the threshold the shoes and socks are cast aside. It has to be bitterly cold before I keep the socks on. I've come to appreciate the neurological importance of the feet gripping the floor. The only slippers I have sit next to the balcony door to protect my feet from the metal fire escape grating when I run over to my daughter's apartment.

We finished out our own Christmas with a home viewing of "Guardians of the Galaxy". Nothing to smoke, but lots of love with our daughter (she lives in the next apartment, but we watch movies here because she's domestically challenged, lol).

I think I speak for all of us when I say that laptop was like a present to all of us. The universe is a good place. It's refreshing to see karma at work.

 

[SweetSue]

I love your style Sue I'm wondering whether or not I should actually use that LOS soil I was cooking as LOS soil, or just let it be a worm bin for me while I'm waiting for new tubs with lids. I feel so stupid for ordering those bins. They WERE advertised as sold with lids... and I've been talking to the seller (don't ever order anything from a seller called "Shoplet" - worst customer service humanly possible.) but they couldn't care less. It took 3 emails to get them to get me a return label. I only ordered 18 gallon bins because I didn't think the 8 gallon ones at walmart would cut it for all my plants, - and the bigger ones didn't have lids!!! GOD!!!!

I just want a big worm bin for Christmas darnit!!

I feel your frustration. I hate it when things don't work out in my planned time frame. Don't beat yourself up. You were only being human in a saggitarian sort of way. LOL I understand it completely. At 61 I still fall victim to my need to do it RIGHT NOW!!! Dale's been trying to retrain that aspect of me for almost 34 years.

This is the second time my son and his wife have punished me like this. It's effective because they know how much I love them. Karma can be a bitch. The kind of payback that accompanies this type of behavior (if you understand the Law of Attraction) is not something I would invite into my world, but they make their own choices. It's beyond painful, but it's also been something of a spiritual journey. Just a painful one that apparently has no foreseeable end in sight. It is what it is. (Sigh) My life is still chock full of love and joy.

Get out there and spread some more joy SoilGirl. You're so good at it.

 

[SweetSue]

Forgot to ask... have you ever used a living mulch before? I believe the mix I used was BAS (it was a gift) and I'm super impressed with it. The cannabis look like they're growing in the wild.

 

[SoilGirl]

Great update StonerGirl Woof Loki - like him a lot And nice furry slippers I might add. Awesome that the family enjoys the greatest gifts of the greatest plant on Christmas day. Looks like you were busy today SG, well done. Thanks for the awesome update and for sharing your efforts. All good things to you and your family - cheers!

Aw thank you Colorful, you make me feel so appreciated Hope your X-mas was awesome. Hahaha yeah, Loki is quite the dog. We have another dog that smokes too lmao. My pit/choc lab mix does. He's less excitable about it though lol, he just likes to lick smoke out of the bong or pipe or vape.. our biggest rottie, Bear, just hates smoke lol. When Loki comes running in, he goes running out. Whatever lol, to each dog their own bone.

Awesome as usual.

thanks marz!

I have my traditional Boxing Day slight headache and feeling rather bleary. Can't imagine why. So I'll keep this short - top update as usual SG. Girls are looking super. I went to 12/12 on Christmas Eve, so I'm very happy that you're switching today too. Now, more coffee, more coffee....

Yep Mr. Teddy the switch was made at 8:00 tonight so we're going to be flowering buddies! Hahaha. I'm excited to see how ours do next to each other's .... not that its a competition or anything ..... (LOL just watch, you'll grow the most amazing buds ever your first indoor grow, and then I'll turn out these little scraggly bud-looking things, some supposed 'teacher' I'll look like hahaha!)

Thanks for stopping in Mr. Teddy! Sorry about the bleariness!

I love the way they've responded to your training SoilGirl. Everyone looks fabulous, and you're right, the soil will take care of the Diesel clones. In two weeks they'll look as fabulous as their healthy cousins.

Your Christmas sounds delightful. Now THAT'S a mom! What a perfect gift for a talented indoor gardener. You can keep the slippers. I'm a barefoot gal myself. As soon as I cross the threshold the shoes and socks are cast aside. It has to be bitterly cold before I keep the socks on. I've come to appreciate the neurological importance of the feet gripping the floor. The only slippers I have sit next to the balcony door to protect my feet from the metal fire escape grating when I run over to my daughter's apartment.

We finished out our own Christmas with a home viewing of "Guardians of the Galaxy". Nothing to smoke, but lots of love with our daughter (she lives in the next apartment, but we watch movies here because she's domestically challenged, lol).

I think I speak for all of us when I say that laptop was like a present to all of us. The universe is a good place. It's refreshing to see karma at work.

Aww thanks so much Sue. Doesn't my mom rock? OK - I had to ask if she'd help at first, but then we ended up enjoying ourselves. Gardening can be so therapeutic It's so rewarding to see day-by-day growth as a result of your efforts. And the training, I'm pretty impressed with the results too, although I know I could have bigger plants if not for this, they wouldn't be sculpted to my design.

It reminds me of these books I read a ton in middle school haha. The "Eragon" series. In it, there was this nation of elves that lived in an enchanted forest, and they grew all of their tools and homes by singing magical songs to the plants and making them grow to their song's designs. Seeing my fluxed/trained plants reminds me of that, and sometimes when I'm singing to them, I pretend that my voice is magically convincing them to take the shape I want - an amusing thought.

I feel your frustration. I hate it when things don't work out in my planned time frame. Don't beat yourself up. You were only being human in a saggitarian sort of way. LOL I understand it completely. At 61 I still fall victim to my need to do it RIGHT NOW!!! Dale's been trying to retrain that aspect of me for almost 34 years.

This is the second time my son and his wife have punished me like this. It's effective because they know how much I love them. Karma can be a bitch. The kind of payback that accompanies this type of behavior (if you understand the Law of Attraction) is not something I would invite into my world, but they make their own choices. It's beyond painful, but it's also been something of a spiritual journey. Just a painful one that apparently has no foreseeable end in sight. It is what it is. (Sigh) My life is still chock full of love and joy.

Get out there and spread some more joy SoilGirl. You're so good at it.

Oh Sue that's just awful. I'm so sorry about that, I agree, that much negativity and spite only brings bad things back in the long run.. I'm so glad you still feel like life is full of joy and love though. That's very impressive. I really envy you that. I don't know if I were you that I'd be able to say my life was still full of joy and love. If someone really does something bad to me I'm pretty grudging to be honest. I wish I weren't, I know that anger isn't healthy, but I still let myself just get so ticked off. I'm really good at still getting on with day-to-day life like its normal anyways, but underneath, I still haven't forgotten that anger and indignation. I really wish I didn't live like this. Brooding on negativity isn't a part of who I like to think I am but still...

Like with my dad, I act like everything's fine on the surface... but really its just because we have to live together and I can't risk my plants. I imagine once we inevitably go separate ways, he won't ever be a big part of my life again.. I don't really want him to be. Like if I have kids... I can't imagine bringing them around him.. he's too volatile, saying and doing awful things at the slightest provocation, like not being able to find candy. (Just days before my Mom got here, there was a midnight incident I didn't talk about here. He thought I stole his peanut brittle... So he almost killed my plants under the Mars II. I had to stand in front of them with pepper spray pointing in his face and screaming again. ...There was a little bit of a message in my present to him if you remember that haha..)

since then I've been silently fuming. Not being able to express your anger or resolve a perpetually recurring problem is hellish. It's alright while my mom's here, but it's getting close to time for her and my sister to leave again, and I'm really dreading that.. then it will be back to worrying when will the next incident be? 3 AM because he can't find some drink or candy he wants?
The next time I walk past him?
If he sees me watching Bill Maher?
-Truly dreading my mom and sis leaving. It makes me have dark thoughts. I dreamed he died and it was actually a positive-mentality dream.. which makes it even darker. I honestly can't tell if I hate what's happening to him or if I just hate him any more. - Well thinking about it, I honestly... hmm, I think I've moved into the hating him category because of how he keeps making choices that make things worse, for himself and us, and since he doesn't want to get better anymore. He told me he's giving up on his health and anyone who thinks they can make him any better's basically an imbecile. Shortly after that, he told me what he really thought of my "Whole CBD and Pot Solution" too.. that it's basically just a sandbox he lets me keep to play in, my whole grow and all medical cannabis in general, a joke to him... He sees all MMJ users as basically, himself; useless drug abusers with a good excuse. I guess I really take that personally, I really can't imagine myself liking any person on the planet that thinks medical cannabis is a total joke. I really wish I were as happy as I've made out to be over the holidays; I really wish things were like this all the time. I honestly think if my mom were here full time from here on out, maybe my Dad and I could move on from this, but since she won't be I'm only afraid the worst is yet to come, and if it really is, I can't imagine me being more forgiving than I've been lately. but that makes me sad... so maybe there's still a tiny bit of hope. maybe. probably not.. but maybe..

Oh there I go again, stealing the spotlight and starting a pity-party for myself. >.< Sorry for that Sue, I didn't intend that, I guess I just wish I were more like you in the end; I can feel bitterness starting to get a grip on me in many ways. >.< Thank you for sharing with me and being a good friend.

Your little Saggitarian joke made me smile by the way

Forgot to ask... have you ever used a living mulch before? I believe the mix I used was BAS (it was a gift) and I'm super impressed with it. The cannabis look like they're growing in the wild.

Nope never before hahah. But I'm super excited for it. I've watched yours and CO's beautiful mulches with much envy for a while now lol. Can't wait to see them come up. Thanks for coming by!

So, yeah, I'm getting a different 10 gallon LOS No-Till smart pot cooking, it should be all ready for a clone in 2 weeks, living mulch sprouts and all. I'm keeping that other smart pot to use as a worm bin for now hahah. My family and I went out for pizza today and watched a bunch of american ninja warrior together, my sister leaves tomorrow so I've been trying to spend as much time as I can with her, sorry I didn't get back to you earlier when I read your messages guys

Goodnight everyone. Hope you're enjoying your holidays.

 

[SweetSue]

It took me 61 years to get to this point in my life where I can forgive so easily, and it's taking the overwhelming support of my entire extended family (spanning the globe) to keep me stable this time. My tendency is to stew in the anger and frustration, knowing that I need to get to forgiveness. Surprisingly, this time I decided that I knew I had to get to forgiveness eventually, so why not spare us the drawn out agony and go right to forgiveness in the beginning? That types out easier than it actually is. My saving grace is my darling daughter, who let's me vent my frustration and cry when I need to. She's the one who holds me when it gets so painful I can't deal with it.

Your father is in a bad place that he sees no way out of. My daughter has a severe anxiety disorder that is so bad she is on disability, so we are each other's support system. Her disability frequently takes her to the point of suicide attempts, so I've had too many years dealing with that. We talk it out all the time, so I have learned to be more sensitive to the pain others bear and to limit my judgement. Truth be told, I've spent a lifetime making it a habit to not judge other people's choices. My mother and her loving parents raised us well in the art of unconditional loving. My basic belief has always been that the whole purpose of life is to love and be loved in return. The situation with my son is rooted in the problem that his wife was raised in a home where love was something you earned and it could be taken away if you stepped outside the lines. My fear is that this episode, like the first will result in him asking for a divorce. Not my idea of a satisfactory resolution.

If you're at all like me (and I suspect you are) you need to have someone to talk it out, too. If that someone is in this community or in your neighborhood, or someone you can call, that doesn't matter. It's not stealing the show. It's being you and being vulnerable. Nothing wrong with that. You have a loving nature. You may not be able to help your dad heal, but you can hate the disease without hating the man. This does not mean you need to stay and be abused. The universe has a wondrous, loving nature. I've witnessed many miracles in my time. Be safe first, but keep on loving. You won't like the alternative.

Your garden is obviously your creative outlet, something you CAN control, and you do that so well you have this huge following. I consider it a pleasure to be included in your community. You always make me smile.

 

[SoilGirl]

It took me 61 years to get to this point in my life where I can forgive so easily, and it's taking the overwhelming support of my entire extended family (spanning the globe) to keep me stable this time. My tendency is to stew in the anger and frustration, knowing that I need to get to forgiveness. Surprisingly, this time I decided that I knew I had to get to forgiveness eventually, so why not spare us the drawn out agony and go right to forgiveness in the beginning? That types out easier than it actually is. My saving grace is my darling daughter, who let's me vent my frustration and cry when I need to. She's the one who holds me when it gets so painful I can't deal with it.

Your father is in a bad place that he sees no way out of. My daughter has a severe anxiety disorder that is so bad she is on disability, so we are each other's support system. Her disability frequently takes her to the point of suicide attempts, so I've had too many years dealing with that. We talk it out all the time, so I have learned to be more sensitive to the pain others bear and to limit my judgement. Truth be told, I've spent a lifetime making it a habit to not judge other people's choices. My mother and her loving parents raised us well in the art of unconditional loving. My basic belief has always been that the whole purpose of life is to love and be loved in return. The situation with my son is rooted in the problem that his wife was raised in a home where love was something you earned and it could be taken away if you stepped outside the lines. My fear is that this episode, like the first will result in him asking for a divorce. Not my idea of a satisfactory resolution.

If you're at all like me (and I suspect you are) you need to have someone to talk it out, too. If that someone is in this community or in your neighborhood, or someone you can call, that doesn't matter. It's not stealing the show. It's being you and being vulnerable. Nothing wrong with that. You have a loving nature. You may not be able to help your dad heal, but you can hate the disease without hating the man. This does not mean you need to stay and be abused. The universe has a wondrous, loving nature. I've witnessed many miracles in my time. Be safe first, but keep on loving. You won't like the alternative.

Your garden is obviously your creative outlet, something you CAN control, and you do that so well you have this huge following. I consider it a pleasure to be included in your community. You always make me smile.

That was such a thoughtful response Sue, wow, thank you for that. I suppose I've kinda been 'stewing' since the first big incident when I moved back in here. My end-game mindset just wasn't necessarily forgiveness.. more like moving on with my life. But I really do still hope that my dad might be able to come back from his spiral. I just doubt it. He's miserable, but its like hes trying to be more miserable. its stupid. I do think he wants to be better deep down, he just doesn't want to have to try, he just wants it to happen. Like if he keeps stewing in his misery one day he'll blink and be better. And that makes my head want to explode >.<

plus my mom is not any help with his drinking. While I'm trying to get him to stop drinking all the time, there she is going through a box of wine every 24 hrs like clockwork, but telling him not to copy her, great. Thanks mom... >.< That's how to inspire change

hahaha that skipping the agony bit does sure sound nice. I just can't convince myself that forgiveness is the answer with him >.< I've forgiven him before and it really doesn't make a difference. There's just always some new traumatic incident on the way, whether you move on from the last or not... I've just come to expect despicably low behavior from him. I guess that's where my optimist streak ran out. :\ ahh.. lame.

Your daughter sounds very sweet, although troubled. I'm sorry to hear of her problems... I hope she can get past this point in her life. I love your life philosophy. Funny, that's the exact problem between my parents in a nutshell. My mom raised us with unconditional love, my dad didn't. He was raised as a military kid, and cause/effect parenting is all he knows. (... to anyone with a similar mindset - that they turned out alright after all the shit their parents put them through, so in turn they can raise their kids like nazis - I say, there's lots of parenting books out there, go have a ball -.- don't let your shitty childhood experiences make you a shitty parent. Break the cycle and learn better ways to parent than with brutal words, fear, or violence. Enough said.)

You and your daughter sound like you have a great relationship. I really respect your philosophy about sensitivity to other's pain and limited judgement, and I'm going to try my best to emulate that in my life. I like to think I'm not judgemental, but I know everyone is to some degree, because everyone has their own unique opinions and backgrounds. But I've always been sensitive to other's pains, since I've always felt like I've had to hide mine growing up. I hope your son doesn't end up asking for a divorce over your issues, and I hope his wife will come around, although I doubt it. I know all too well people raised like that don't really change...

Thank you for reassuring me about being vulnerable. I just feel a little uncomfortable sometimes sharing that stuff, although yes, it does make me feel better. On one level I want the spotlight to share and feel better, on another its like, "oh god they probably think I'm so spoiled, they're probably judging me, blah blah blah" - I've always put too much stock in how others see me, bending over backwards to be likeable and fit in.

I think that bending over backwards had to do with my bi-curiousity issues in high school, when I was younger I felt really ashamed that I wanted to kiss another girl - and the other kids would think that was so weird... there was one incident that took me years to get over in middle school where I asked a friend of mine who I had a crush on if they felt like that about me (NO) and I lost a good friend, so I really repressed that part of me until highschool, really trying to convince myself I only liked guys in the most twisted ways. It really affected, and probably still affects (by the way that it helped shape) how I interact with others socially. Lol I understand my psyche very well in some ways, very little in others... talking to people like you really helps.

I'm going to try not to hate my dad. I don't. Not right now anyways.. It's just.. complicated. It's easier to hate than to love. If I hate anything, its the fear of the unknown; not knowing when hes going to be terrible next. I still love parts of my dad... its just he's changed so much. I don't know how many of the parts that I loved are left... but gardening... gardening, we both still enjoy, and my first experiences in the garden were with my Dad, growing rows and rows of strawberries and some squash in our yard back when we lived in Westminster. If anything, I can at least love my dad for sharing that passion with me... and if all else fails, one good thing from him will live on with me...

Thanks for the thoughtful post again Sue. I really love doing this journal. I'm about to do a little update too. See ya!

 

[Green Dreamz]

Hi Soil Girl......just caught up on the last few pages....will have to catch up with the rest later....i did check out the 1st page and your setup......gotta say that i Love the Mcgyver set up......and you obviously know what you are doing.......i do the lazy organic with bottled nutes....but even then i only have three 1 gallon airpots with autos in it.....along with hydro and hempy now......i tend to get bored and add new styles i havent done before still in search of the aw inspiring technique that fits me the best........i would also like to say that i am subbing to your journal not just because of your growing capabilities, but from listening to you on other peoples journals and now reading the last few pages you are some one that i want to know.....i have found some of the most incredible people here on 420 and with the exception of a few members that should move to one of the other sites that people only want to brag about how much better they are than you and not want to share, no one has been judgemental in the least....always more than happy to help.......i am truly sorry to hear aobut your relationship with your father....or yet the lack of.......i cant imagine what you must be going thru having to deal with him.....you sound like the type of person that only deserves to be loved and not taken advantage of....i am sorry if i over stepped the boundaries, but you will find that i am not very good at not opening my big mouthlol anyway if i did overstep just let me know and i will watch what i say in the future......other than high jacking your journal....sorry about that...i am a little long winded......i am subd from here out unless you tell me otherwise......on the journal so far and look forward to the rest of it

 

[SoilGirl]

Eight Pictures - a Festival of Lights

Hahah, just because 'tis the season. So, Flowering Day One was yesterday... here's those ladies after their first night of sleep in a long time. (I usually prefer to veg in 18/6 - but lately I've been trying 24/0... seems to be doing no harm..) Here's how they look under that light when the Bloom Spectrum is turned on.

Gotta love that red glow

Dinafem Diesel!

I defoled a bit today, not a major strip-job like you've seen me do before, but I think this is plenty to encourage some good tight nodes down the branches a bit. I left lower fans that weren't covering up any nodes and tucked a few that I felt were better off tucked than cut.

The reason I'm defoling today is I want to prepare this one to go into flower in about 2 weeks, but have it optimally developed for big long colas instead of a blanket of short stout ones up top. I'll probably defol it again in a week or so, then a week or so later again.

Ghost OG Flux

Thought it was about time for an update on this one. I tied down 4 new nodes, removed 4 that were too tight together imo, have been lazily trying to keep the bonds tight, and have been opening new growth tips every day and tucking fans. I must say, this flux is going more quickly than I thought, and has been very low maintenance. To anyone that wants to flux but is putting it off, just try it, its way easier than it might look.

Red Cherry Berry

Honestly not much new with this one. Still thick-limbed, lush, and bushy. The gnats are bugging this one more than any other, probably because this is one of the stinkiest vegging plants now. I love it's damp green smell, it reminds me of rainforest incense.

Blue Blood

I thought I was going to be keeping this one shorter, but I'm having doubts about my plan to keep it as a mother. I mean... Must I really keep the from-seed plants as mothers? I seriously doubt there will be any genetic differences between it and a first-generation cutting. Plus I'm no big-time grower... far from it. For those reasons, I may put this one into flowering soon too, and just use it's cutting to keep the so-called bloodline going.

Regardless, it's looking beautiful, and it's starting to give off a nice fruity smell. I love the personality I can pick up on from growing this way, in old school organics.

OG Kush PR

If I have an 'elite' strain, this is it. I can just tell by the way it grows and smells already... This one, which was miles behind Diesel just weeks ago, is now about to surpass Diesel in height, width, and number of potential budsites. And the smell, god it almost smells more like bud than my dry buds hahaha >.<

Problem though... there's still a few teeny tiny mealybugs on new growth, deforming them. I'm tired of messing around with the neem oil, so I'm just going to do two drenches in 3 days time. Tomorrow, I will drench the whole plant in Monterey Garden Insect Spray with Spinosad. Then 3 days later, I will drench it in a Bon-Neem oil concentrate and Pyrethrin mix. Mealybugs have honestly grossed me out more than any other pest I've encountered, their fuzz is just so off-putting. So, vengeance time.

And here are the clones that are left. The two that look the best, surprisingly are the two not showing roots yet, RCB and BB. But I think that will change tomorrow or the next day, with any luck. The two super-scraggly ones are CK#1 cuttings, I may plant them together. They're rooting very slowly at the moment, and are going to take a while to regain their vigor, but the genes live on from their beautiful mama and that's a win in my book.

 

[Bud Grant]

looks good