Your stoner quotes

Re: Your stoner quotes.

This is from Cheech and Chongs next movie.

"Responsibility is a heavy Responsibility man"

(Cheech) Hey man your suppose to be selling that dope not smoking it man we havnt even paid for it yet, (Chong) Im selling it hey listen I sold two lids lastnight hows that, (Cheech) Oh yeah? alriight homes who'd ya sell em to? (Chong) Me. (Cheech) Ooh man shit man we're gonna starve to death man, (Chong) No not with me man im a good customer.
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

"I can't believe I just said that!"

"Why? You're stoned, aren't ya?"
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

TrueHustler said:
This is from Cheech and Chongs next movie.

"Responsibility is a heavy Responsibility man"

(Cheech) Hey man your suppose to be selling that dope not smoking it man we havnt even paid for it yet, (Chong) Im selling it hey listen I sold two lids lastnight hows that, (Cheech) Oh yeah? alriight homes who'd ya sell em to? (Chong) Me. (Cheech) Ooh man shit man we're gonna starve to death man, (Chong) No not with me man im a good customer.
Click to expand...

Thats gold.

One night i was playing band hero, and i can't remember the song, but i started singing the tune in mocking phonetics saying i didn't really like that song, untill the song preview stopped and i stopped and said "aha, that songs not too bad aye.."
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

This is a true story! My ex and I were smoking one night and my dog likes to "smoke" with us; she comes running when she hears the sack rattle. Anyway, I digress...we were extremely high; I was so high I didnt want to get up for some water and believe me, I had the COTTON mouth! Anyways, my ex goes into the kitchen and Jade, (my dog) follows him, apparently thinking "hmm, food!". My ex says "every time I come in the kitchen you think something is for you! Nothing in here is for you!" That was when Jade sat on her haunches, looked up at him with her head cocked to the side and said, "Ruh ruh ruh!" (like, "yeah yeah yeah, whatever" My dog backtalked my ex! It was hilarious!
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

-Smoked waaaay too much (about half an 1/8th rolled into a giant cone, which we finished in about 5 minutes because we were outside and it was cold) and we finish and go down in my friends basement. He puts on the simpsons and I'm so high that I geek out for a good 20 minutes stop, look at him straightfaced and go "absurd..." and continue geeking out.

-Another time, same friend and I are again in his basement, and he is on his computer and his screen saver comes on which is fish swimming around. I'm on the couch playing guitar and he looks at me and starts pretending he is swimming, without moving. I look at him and ask him what he's doing, he says "look at the water man, i need to swim to you!"

-A girl I dated had one of those aroma therapy pillows, which happened to be cinnamon scented, that you heat up for 20 seconds in the microwave. She hit a few too many zeros one time and the filling melted. I'm chilling in the living room when she goes to get a drink, having completely forgotten about the pillow. Sees the filling leaking out of the microwave and yells "I melted the pillow!". The house smelled like burnt cinnamon for a month!

-Finally, my current girlfriend and I try out her new bong and get just completely wasted high. Like, i don't know where I am kinda thing. We finish and go to get food. Her cat is sleeping on the counter and for some reason I stare at the cat for a minute and she asks me what I'm doing. I just say really quietly, without looking away from the cat and go, "You seem like you would punch a cat..."
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

A few from my friends and I...

Saw a man riding a bike next to a bike path but not on it, "What the hell is wrong with that fool? Why doesn't he just go on the bath pike?"

"The bowl looks like hello kitty."

My friends legs were wrapped up in a blanket, "You have goat legs!"

Upon listening to the beatles after smoking stolen stripper weed we think may have been laced, we turned off the lights to trip and my one friend started freaking out and said,"There is a demon behind me, his name is Thee Flaming Giant, he's looking at me with glass eyes, turn the light on!" Turns light on, "Hey, why'd you turn the light on?"
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

Many yrs ago, lots younger and dumber.......

While taking a ride one afternoon and smokin a fatty we found ourselves in a neighborhood I didn't know very well, so I stopped at an intersection to figure out which way to go (this would have been simpler if we weren't so stoned - of course!):rollit:

After a couple of minutes I make a right and my girlfriend hangs her head out the window and looks back, while yelling "WAIT< STOP> GO BACK" so i hit the brakes and ask what the hell is wrong. To which she replies "I dropped the joint out of this hole":oops: ("this hole" being what most of us would call a WINDOW!)
Now that's a real stonner move, but it becomes hillarious when I tell you that as she is saying this I look over across the street and realize we are sitting in front of the police station!!:thedoubletake:

No....I did not let her get out and go back for it!
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

i just thought of something real funny man ... your mamma-cheech and chong movie. i like to say it when other people say off color comments. i usually leave off the your momma part and only say it when someone is making fun of others misfortune and there is someone close by who knows what i am refering to.
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

one time my cousin came over to my house, baked!, and we were sitting on the porch and I had no idea she was high and I was kinda worried about her and I was like '...nicole...how many fingers am I holding up?' I was holding up 2 and she said 'NONE!! Your holding up a peace sign!!' with the most retarded grin EVER! and then, that same night!, her rocking chair rocked backwards and her face was like 'O.O/:O' XD, I laughed so hard. Good times, good times... XD
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

I got really baked before my cousin came and picked me up one day. I had to go and take some money out of the bank. She told me we were going to a free atm near her house. Ive only used the atm thats at my bank. We get there and I step out of the car and walk up to do my thing. Then it asks for my Personal Identification Number. I turn and yell at my cousin in the car, "WTF is a Personal Identification Number?!" She called me an idiot and everyone in the parking lot laughed..

Personal Identification Number... PIN
;)

My friends and I were passing a bong and playing a board game one night, everytime you hit a certain square, you got the bong. I was playing very well that night when I decided I had to go to the Dollar tree and get some soda. My boyfriend said he wanted the Rootbeer ripe off and I headed out. When I got there, I grabbed two Orange 3 liter sodas under each arm then started stareing at the shelves... there are 3 different kinds of soda at the dollar tree and it took me almost 10 minutes of stareing and humming to remember what kind he wanted
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

This is not a quote, but a funny thing that happened after my first time smoking REAL DANK back when I was a freshman at University, it was Strawberry Cough, and I was talking with my friends and walking having a full conversation, then I went TOTALLY blank and had to ask what we were talking about and my buddies were all like WTF!?! Haha, greayt, stupid times.
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

It's a curious thing. Can all be discussing the same subject, chattering on, giving reasonably intelligent responses...

And then one person says, "What was I talking about?"

And suddenly no one has a clue.

I ponder. I wonder. Does the human animal have a rather elaborate "communication autopilot" program that works fine until there is an error, but that is insufficient of itself to resume?

Hmm... Sativas.

Love 'em.
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

Tortured Soul,

I have pondered that myself. I find myself somehow thinking about other things when I have been drinking lots but still being able to talk about whatever that person is talking about...and shocking myself by whats coming out of my mouth becuase at that present time I have no recollection of thinking up that such idea.
 
Re: Your stoner quotes.

"Dude I hope that alien is ok" "Hahahahahaha! Right. The alien.."
 

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