- Thread starter
- #81
Wesker
New Member
Re: Your stoner quotes.
"Umm.. Uhhh.. Yea.. What..?"
"Dude, you feel like..... a marshmellow!"
"Umm.. Uhhh.. Yea.. What..?"
"Dude, you feel like..... a marshmellow!"
Your stoner quotes
- Thread starter Wesker
- Start date
- Thread starter
- #82
Wesker
New Member
Re: Your stoner quotes.
This one isn't really a quote.
But last the other night when my mates and i were smoking, it was about 2am and we were all finished, but my mate Chris had made me a cup of tea which was too hot, so i was just holding it for ages.. eventually, i fell asleep thus spilling all the tea over me- waking me up.
"Spilling tea is devastating."
This one isn't really a quote.
But last the other night when my mates and i were smoking, it was about 2am and we were all finished, but my mate Chris had made me a cup of tea which was too hot, so i was just holding it for ages.. eventually, i fell asleep thus spilling all the tea over me- waking me up.
"Spilling tea is devastating."
420 towelie
New Member
Re: Your stoner quotes.
One of my first few times smoking (only been smoking for a couple of months now), I made the comment "I'm just so happy to be alive" and now my roommate asks me how much I enjoy life randomly.
One of my first few times smoking (only been smoking for a couple of months now), I made the comment "I'm just so happy to be alive" and now my roommate asks me how much I enjoy life randomly.
soapbar
New Member
Re: Your stoner quotes.
okay so back at the start of my wonderful cannabis inspired journey my best friend and me would buy an ounce or two and spend the next few days in our own hazy bubble
but after about a year or two of this he moved in with his gran so we had too start to do it all on the fly from her so we started changing letters about in words so that she wouldnt click on and we ended up saying juild a boint for build a joint anyway we have dinner one day and hiz gran turns round and goes mark (my friend) juild a boint
of course me and mark are in utter shock i burst out in the worst case of the giggles ever and he is in utter shock what he said too her and she says i dunno you two say it every 10 minutes so i thought id say it too
ooohhhh good times dunno if its actually tht funny or it was just because i iwas really stoned
okay so back at the start of my wonderful cannabis inspired journey my best friend and me would buy an ounce or two and spend the next few days in our own hazy bubble
but after about a year or two of this he moved in with his gran so we had too start to do it all on the fly from her so we started changing letters about in words so that she wouldnt click on and we ended up saying juild a boint for build a joint anyway we have dinner one day and hiz gran turns round and goes mark (my friend) juild a boint of course me and mark are in utter shock i burst out in the worst case of the giggles ever and he is in utter shock what he said too her and she says i dunno you two say it every 10 minutes so i thought id say it too
ooohhhh good times dunno if its actually tht funny or it was just because i iwas really stoned
soapbar
New Member
Re: Your stoner quotes.
oh just read the if in doubt err roll a joint and it reminded me
i was working as a plasterer and we were waiting too see if the walls would dry fast enough ir not and i said how can you not fuckin tell if there dry youve been doing this for 15 years to which my boss ran downstairs and jumped into the van he runs backk into the house were doing and comes upto me and hands me a half oz of some nice greeen and says
IF IN DOUBT SMOKE THE FUCKER OUT
oh just read the if in doubt err roll a joint and it reminded me
i was working as a plasterer and we were waiting too see if the walls would dry fast enough ir not and i said how can you not fuckin tell if there dry youve been doing this for 15 years to which my boss ran downstairs and jumped into the van he runs backk into the house were doing and comes upto me and hands me a half oz of some nice greeen and says
IF IN DOUBT SMOKE THE FUCKER OUT
Re: Your stoner quotes.
I used to have a buddy named Jim who looked and sounded like a short Tommy Chong. One day I'm hookin' up with him at the park lunch hour to burn one. I've got a guy from work with me who's a novice toker.
My buddy had a bag of a notorious local strain of weed called Meigs County Red. The stuff was ultra-potent and still is if you can find it. Compared to the pot that was around then,1978,this stuff was unbelievable.
We get about three tokes in and my coworker is wrecked. I pass the joint his way and he goes,"No thanks,I've had enough." Jim,the Tommy Chong clone,get's this wild look in his eyes,slams his fist down on the table and starts screaming "You must smoke pot!" over and over and threatening to kick the guys ass. My coworker finally goes "Fuck you" to Jim and Jim jumps him.
Now my coworker was roughly the size of a small ***** while Jim was 5'4" and maybe 110 lbs. He picks Jim up off the ground and is holding him sideways about chest high trying to figure out out what to do with this tiny flailing hippy. About that time Jim bites big guy on the gut and the guy drops him. Jim goes rolling down the hillside and into a little hollow.
I'm laughing my ass off and Jim is somewhere down in brush hollering for help and cussing. My coworker and I walked over to the company truck and left Jim's crazy ass down in that hollow. He was still yelling as we drove off.
I don't think the lil' fugger ever forgave me for that.
I used to have a buddy named Jim who looked and sounded like a short Tommy Chong. One day I'm hookin' up with him at the park lunch hour to burn one. I've got a guy from work with me who's a novice toker.
My buddy had a bag of a notorious local strain of weed called Meigs County Red. The stuff was ultra-potent and still is if you can find it. Compared to the pot that was around then,1978,this stuff was unbelievable.
We get about three tokes in and my coworker is wrecked. I pass the joint his way and he goes,"No thanks,I've had enough." Jim,the Tommy Chong clone,get's this wild look in his eyes,slams his fist down on the table and starts screaming "You must smoke pot!" over and over and threatening to kick the guys ass. My coworker finally goes "Fuck you" to Jim and Jim jumps him.
Now my coworker was roughly the size of a small ***** while Jim was 5'4" and maybe 110 lbs. He picks Jim up off the ground and is holding him sideways about chest high trying to figure out out what to do with this tiny flailing hippy. About that time Jim bites big guy on the gut and the guy drops him. Jim goes rolling down the hillside and into a little hollow.
I'm laughing my ass off and Jim is somewhere down in brush hollering for help and cussing. My coworker and I walked over to the company truck and left Jim's crazy ass down in that hollow. He was still yelling as we drove off.
I don't think the lil' fugger ever forgave me for that.
Re: Your stoner quotes.
A few years ago when I was still pretty novice at smoking, I was hotboxing a car with three friends for hours. We decided it was a nice night and so we went out and strolled around for a bit. We were out for a couple hours before deciding to return for more fun. One of the guys in the car, Luke, was a first-timer, so I decided it was time to fuck with him. I turn around and ask him how he's been enjoying his evening thus far, and he responds "This is awesome, how long have we been out here?" So i glance at the clock, which is off by a lot, and told him we've only been there for 30 minutes. His eyes widened in terror as he tried to go back and remember what happened during the last five hours...he couldn't, and so we went the whole night convincing him that he imagined everything that went on that night.
Also, he came up with this brilliant piece of philosophical wonder...
"If I'm high, and I can choose to act not-high - because i know what not-high looks and sounds like - do you think someone who is mentally retarded could choose to act not-retarded? And am I a bad person for thinking it would be funny to see someone act not-retarded?"
A few years ago when I was still pretty novice at smoking, I was hotboxing a car with three friends for hours. We decided it was a nice night and so we went out and strolled around for a bit. We were out for a couple hours before deciding to return for more fun. One of the guys in the car, Luke, was a first-timer, so I decided it was time to fuck with him. I turn around and ask him how he's been enjoying his evening thus far, and he responds "This is awesome, how long have we been out here?" So i glance at the clock, which is off by a lot, and told him we've only been there for 30 minutes. His eyes widened in terror as he tried to go back and remember what happened during the last five hours...he couldn't, and so we went the whole night convincing him that he imagined everything that went on that night.
Also, he came up with this brilliant piece of philosophical wonder...
"If I'm high, and I can choose to act not-high - because i know what not-high looks and sounds like - do you think someone who is mentally retarded could choose to act not-retarded? And am I a bad person for thinking it would be funny to see someone act not-retarded?"
retired again dude
New Member
Re: Your stoner quotes.
Its all a mater of Quality of Life.....just toke!
Its all a mater of Quality of Life.....just toke!
- Thread starter
- #90
Wesker
New Member
Re: Your stoner quotes.
I once had this digital clock in my room, and looking at in from certain angles would make the numbers look different.
Anyways, my mate and i were grillin' in my room, and i was watching the time random, it was like 4:05 or something, and when looked again in 2 minutes, 4:07 looked like 4:01.
I randomly wigged out and am like "JOSH, WE JUST SMOKED OURSELVES BACK IN TIME 4 MINUTES!" .. upon inspecting the clock later more closely, i realized it was just a visual obstruction.
None the less- Good times.
I once had this digital clock in my room, and looking at in from certain angles would make the numbers look different.
Anyways, my mate and i were grillin' in my room, and i was watching the time random, it was like 4:05 or something, and when looked again in 2 minutes, 4:07 looked like 4:01.
I randomly wigged out and am like "JOSH, WE JUST SMOKED OURSELVES BACK IN TIME 4 MINUTES!" .. upon inspecting the clock later more closely, i realized it was just a visual obstruction.
None the less- Good times.
DXM89
New Member
Re: Your stoner quotes.
I few nights ago, my friend smoked me out 4:20 am. That was the first time I smoked at that 4:20, so I texted my friend down in Georgia "Dude, I just smoked at 2:40!! Sweet!" The next morning I see a text from him, "Dyslexic much? Hippie.."
I few nights ago, my friend smoked me out 4:20 am. That was the first time I smoked at that 4:20, so I texted my friend down in Georgia "Dude, I just smoked at 2:40!! Sweet!" The next morning I see a text from him, "Dyslexic much? Hippie.."
JustPirates
New Member
Re: Your stoner quotes.
hahaha, I'd totally watch that!
Well, as long as they had Al to guide Jesus around time. After all, what was Quantum Leap without Al and his crazy ass suits?
hahaha, I'd totally watch that!
Well, as long as they had Al to guide Jesus around time. After all, what was Quantum Leap without Al and his crazy ass suits?
MeanBean
New Member
Re: Your stoner quotes.
Yea!,Er No, Er Wait....
Yea!,Er No, Er Wait....
JustPirates
New Member
Re: Your stoner quotes.
"hey man, did I hit this?"
"hey man, did I hit this?"
DXM89
New Member
Re: Your stoner quotes.
Been there dude.
"Are you gunna hit that?" ,"I thought I did.." ,"Well maybe, just smoke it so I can go!" ,"But it might your turn!!" ,"I call peer pressure! Don't say no, just smoke it!" (bubbles.)
Been there dude.
"Are you gunna hit that?" ,"I thought I did.." ,"Well maybe, just smoke it so I can go!" ,"But it might your turn!!" ,"I call peer pressure! Don't say no, just smoke it!" (bubbles.)
Re: Your stoner quotes.
We're defeating the Mexican Cartels, one closet at a time
We're defeating the Mexican Cartels, one closet at a time
retired again dude
New Member
Re: Your stoner quotes.
I don't no if it's a quote but when your setting in a circle and the person next tho you says... "HERE " .....lol my favorite word when getting high!
I don't no if it's a quote but when your setting in a circle and the person next tho you says... "HERE " .....lol my favorite word when getting high!
COmmjDude
New Member
Re: Your stoner quotes.
haha lost my car in downtown denver one summer night a couple years back with some buddies high as shit on some sour diesel and this was the quote that began our five hour dude weres my car? adventure
"Hey do you guys want to smoke this j?" me
"Yeah dude but we should smoke it in the car" my buddy
"Ah SHIT Man do you guys remember were the parking garage is?"me
"Dude Weres your Car?!" my buddies simutaneously
Haha what a great nite at least i had my weed with me and not in the car
haha lost my car in downtown denver one summer night a couple years back with some buddies high as shit on some sour diesel and this was the quote that began our five hour dude weres my car? adventure
"Hey do you guys want to smoke this j?" me
"Yeah dude but we should smoke it in the car" my buddy
"Ah SHIT Man do you guys remember were the parking garage is?"me
"Dude Weres your Car?!" my buddies simutaneously
Haha what a great nite at least i had my weed with me and not in the car
whyYESitsMARY
New Member
Re: Your stoner quotes.
One time, my friend and I were casually eating Kit Kats after we smoked our brand new bong. I bit into one and for some reason the wafer thing in the middle wasn't there, in my stoned confusion I blurted out "It doesn't crunchy"
Completely mixing up "It isn't crunchy" and "It didn't crunch"
I haven't laughed that hard in a long time.
Another time I was driving my friend home and we had just got done smoking and she said "I feel bad that you have to ride me everywhere"
My friend and I had just bought a rather complex new bong, and our other friend was gonna hit it, but started analyzing it instead and decided it was too complicated and our other friend (who rarely speaks or smokes) just yelled "Quit being a pussy and hit it"
That's all i can remember for now. haha
One time, my friend and I were casually eating Kit Kats after we smoked our brand new bong. I bit into one and for some reason the wafer thing in the middle wasn't there, in my stoned confusion I blurted out "It doesn't crunchy"
Completely mixing up "It isn't crunchy" and "It didn't crunch"
I haven't laughed that hard in a long time.
Another time I was driving my friend home and we had just got done smoking and she said "I feel bad that you have to ride me everywhere"
My friend and I had just bought a rather complex new bong, and our other friend was gonna hit it, but started analyzing it instead and decided it was too complicated and our other friend (who rarely speaks or smokes) just yelled "Quit being a pussy and hit it"
That's all i can remember for now. haha
