Woodsman Outdoors
- Thread starter Woodsman
- Start date
lavendar
New Member
got it....hope you had a great time...L
woodsman:
ok, enough goofing off...jk..hope youre feeling better.....if youre not, i bet the leap off the balcony is starting to sound good....just remember where not to put the rope....L
- Thread starter
- #1,363
I figured something was 'amiss' Tmac my good friend! No worries lassy, I was deep in 'thought' myself when I read your post.
No more jumping off the balcony for me L! I've moved up in life ( or 'down' really). My wife fixed up our living room sofa bed and brought down my 'arsenal' which consists of all my personal stash, favorite hickory pipe, various pills, water bottle, bottle of deodorant (this injury won't stop me from keeping up with my personal hygiene), pair of headphones for the laptop, pipe cleaners and various odds and ends along with stuff that I don't remember.
So now I find myself downstairs with the living! Main reason was that it's easier for my wife who I depend on greatly for just about everything! Nothing like going up and down our spiral staircase with handfuls of items like washbasins and meals etc. etc...........
lavendar
New Member
I figured something was 'amiss' Tmac my good friend! No worries lassy, I was deep in 'thought' myself when I read your post.
No more jumping off the balcony for me L! I've moved up in life ( or 'down' really). My wife fixed up our living room sofa bed and brought down my 'arsenal' which consists of all my personal stash, favorite hickory pipe, various pills, water bottle, bottle of deodorant (this injury won't stop me from keeping up with my personal hygiene), pair of headphones for the laptop, pipe cleaners and various odds and ends along with stuff that I don't remember.
So now I find myself downstairs with the living! Main reason was that it's easier for my wife who I depend on greatly for just about everything! Nothing like going up and down our spiral staircase with handfuls of items like washbasins and meals etc. etc...........
oh, thats great....for both of you....but you forgot snacks!! most imp. after the pipe....ive just been wondering around making a goof out of myself....what a night....great way to start new yrs...but i am laughing...take care of you....and be sure to hug the wife, alot.....have another couple of notes to send you about the smoke we were talking about....later, hugs, L and hubby
Barry Manilow
New Member
Hey W hang in there my friend. Sounds like you're making at least a little progress. Hope I never have back probs.... take care!
HorseBadoritz
Well-Known Member
Hay Woody, Nothing like a bad back, oy! After 35 yrs of construction, I finally wacked mine about 5 years ago. I'm helping my chiropractor's girlfriend make her Mercedes payments, though :0
Mrs Horse's hippy dippy cuz gave me a bag with rice sewn in it. Heat it in the microwave, does wonders. Alternate with ice. Ice slows things down and numbs, heat brings healing blood.
I'm practicing this stuff right now. Came out of the crawl last night in the dark and rain, slipped in the mud, landed on my hip on hose sprayer I'd left laying out there to spray down the girls... chalk up another pot related injury stat... tough biz
So brotherman, we could go on tour as The Simp and The Gimp!
Hope ya get well soon, and have a green new year (I ate MY collards!)
Mrs Horse's hippy dippy cuz gave me a bag with rice sewn in it. Heat it in the microwave, does wonders. Alternate with ice. Ice slows things down and numbs, heat brings healing blood.
I'm practicing this stuff right now. Came out of the crawl last night in the dark and rain, slipped in the mud, landed on my hip on hose sprayer I'd left laying out there to spray down the girls... chalk up another pot related injury stat... tough biz
So brotherman, we could go on tour as The Simp and The Gimp!
Hope ya get well soon, and have a green new year (I ate MY collards!)
Barry Manilow
New Member
Sorry to hear about your fall Horse. However to surpass Woodsmans efforts this past summer you'd have to suddenly stand up and put your head right through the roof of the crawl and into the kitchen, where the startled Mrs. Horse will drop a large pot of boiling spaghetti on your noggin. I'm not suggesting this mind you....
HorseBadoritz
Well-Known Member
Sorry to hear about your fall Horse. However to surpass Woodsmans efforts this past summer you'd have to suddenly stand up and put your head right through the roof of the crawl and into the kitchen, where the startled Mrs. Horse will drop a large pot of boiling spaghetti on your noggin. I'm not suggesting this mind you....
- Thread starter
- #1,369
Hay Woody, Nothing like a bad back, oy! After 35 yrs of construction, I finally wacked mine about 5 years ago. I'm helping my chiropractor's girlfriend make her Mercedes payments, though :0
Mrs Horse's hippy dippy cuz gave me a bag with rice sewn in it. Heat it in the microwave, does wonders. Alternate with ice. Ice slows things down and numbs, heat brings healing blood.
I'm practicing this stuff right now. Came out of the crawl last night in the dark and rain, slipped in the mud, landed on my hip on hose sprayer I'd left laying out there to spray down the girls... chalk up another pot related injury stat... tough biz
So brotherman, we could go on tour as The Simp and The Gimp!
Hope ya get well soon, and have a green new year (I ate MY collards!)
Sorry to hear about your fall Horse. However to surpass Woodsmans efforts this past summer you'd have to suddenly stand up and put your head right through the roof of the crawl and into the kitchen, where the startled Mrs. Horse will drop a large pot of boiling spaghetti on your noggin. I'm not suggesting this mind you....
Who let you two loose?!! Call out the fire dept or something!! LOL!
Hope you feel better soon Horse.Howdy Blue and Horse nice to have you visiting around the sanitariu.......I mean the infirmary. I'm in the "Hopeless, but nowhere else to put them ward" (they mistakenly -must be nuts - wrote on the door 'For the Chronically Insane - Keep Out).
Make yourselves at home choose one of the following traits excepted here by staff.
...drooling is a common one and also very effective for dry lips.
...Talking to ones self is a popular past time here and less messy than the first one. .
...My all time favorite though is picking my nose and then using the opposite hand to vigorously scratch my b*tt hole (both at the same time of course). I get a lot of attention doing this....
It's so fun to watch the other 'guests' as they react .
Some enjoy knocking their heads against the wall while some will just slap themselves silly while laughing hysterically. Others become quiet and just stare at me from the dark corner (the two axe murderers do this quite often) 
Occasionally, when I'm bored, I'll pick my nose and flick b**gers at the two
(not necessary to scratch my b*tt for this to get exciting). Huge load of fun for me and them as they chase me all around the property. All the wards empty out as they too want to follow behind (don't want to miss out on the grand ole fun)! When I've had enough fun and excitement I lead them all to the perimeter fence (electric) and pretend to stick my tongue on it (we play 'Simon Says' quite often on rainy days). This is hilarious and really makes my day when they all imitate me.
Before the staff arrives (1 - 2 hours on a good day) I like to sit down on the bench, take out my old pipe, fill it with some of my good stuff and light it up. Within minutes word spreads throughout the neighborhood and soon the juvenile delinquents arrive and begin pelting the inmat..I mean 'Group members', with various hard objects.
A bit later....
the crew arrives and starts prying the 'guests' off the fence.. Usually takes the staff a half hour to get them all down. Some refuse to let go and are left hanging all night. Well it gives the local delinquents something to do so it's not a total waste of humanity.
Later....
...after all disciplinary measures are done, which involves standing the group up against the dungeon wall and hosing them down with cold water. All except for poor innocent me of course! I'm rewarded for not participating. Last time I got to eat and sleep with the dogs!
Right after that......
.........staff will take the time to explain that this type of group behavior (like sticking ones tongue on an electric fence - with or without rain) is unacceptable.
.........The staff, bless their little hearts, always tells the others after they've removed all the loose teeth and burnt hair, how much they'd appreciate it if the group would just stop 'acting out', getting in trouble and try, just try to emulate the 'kind', 'sweet' and very innocent 'Brother Woodsman' who selflessly displays nothing but proper etiquette and the very best in good behavior -all the time.
Three weeks later they'll all be let out of the dungeon and allowed to return to the 'Ward'. Of course by this time they'll have forgotten why they were there in the first place.....
. Tune in later for other great stories and ramblings!!!
To think you invited me and my nurse there once. I ant thet dum!
lavendar
New Member
it just amazes me that he let the staff hose them down....so cruel....perhaps the current will help with the droolers? hope youre feeling better woods, will send you a note later.....L.....we're finished......one pleasant task accomplished....
- Thread starter
- #1,372
it just amazes me that he let the staff hose them down....so cruel....perhaps the current will help with the droolers? hope youre feeling better woods, will send you a note later.....L.....we're finished......one pleasant task accomplished....
I'm not responsible for any stories I make up! I claim total ignorance.....
.Hows my two friends out on the Pacific doing? L, may all your tasks be pleasant, even the unpleasant ones!
The last time you showed up at the institution OMM, your nurse caused a riot to break out at the pool area. The news reports at the time mentioned 'old timers in speedos observed chasing large budded Asian Nurse thru the State Mental Institution's grounds.' No one was hurt in the fray though several young children outside the gates observed the spectacle and are now in shock.
- Thread starter
- #1,374
I just love these stories when they get going!!
Hello T
I don't know what possesses me, could it be something in my smoke?
- Thread starter
- #1,375
I think it's wonderful that 420 finally posted group shots of some of us!
I can spot Lav and Blue Dog in there!
Barry Manilow
New Member
Hahaha.... Woodsman you're rounding back into form my friend!
Woodsman!
Now I know how you screwed your back up! Found the pool and just like you said, Tuesdays are the best time to pick up some chicks there, you forgot to mention they had no arms or legs, that made things much easier.
Now I know how you screwed your back up! Found the pool and just like you said, Tuesdays are the best time to pick up some chicks there, you forgot to mention they had no arms or legs, that made things much easier.
Here To Learn
New Member
Woodsman you have put me in good spirits with your hilarity. I hope this means you are doing better friend.
Hey Wood and Sisco.... did you know we are getting a charter plane and heading to OMM's. Taking sleeping bags and tents. I am bringing a blow up bed for Wood. He cant just lay on the ground right now. Also with a charter plane we can medicate...yuk yuk yuk~~ love the new smiley, I am using it often!!
It snowed here for awhile tonight.....
It snowed here for awhile tonight.....
