SoilGirl's Indoor Organic Soil Medical Grow Journal - Mars II 1600 & Other LEDs

[SmokerJoe]

I've also seen people saying to just paint ur walls really bright white for closets and smaller spaces. I know by choosing the lighting I'm going with,(CFL) I need to get every little bit out of them. If my math is right, the 50' roll at my local grow shop will cover it fine and is only like $17 - $20 I think. I'm fine with that. I was mainly curious because I hadn't really seen any feedback on the creasing of the mylar. I was hoping SG would be able to lay some firsthand on us. Plus, she looks like she's running a combo of lights and I wondered if she had noticed a difference between lights in regards to how well the Mylar reflects and reacts to the different lights.

I will definitely check out the Panda Plastic. I'm like a kid at Disneyland right now. I want to see and do everything!!!!! I am so glad I came across this site! The information has been invaluable. Only ever grown outside in gardens and stuff, so the indoor thing is new to me. I can't even keep the house plants alive. But, I can grow some of the biggest tomatoes and peppers you've ever seen. I hope I make the transition smoothly.

Hey there. I see you new so welcome to the forums its a great place to be. I was stationed in everett and bremerton and lived in lynnwood so I know washington pretty well. My ex lives in yakima. Anyways, let me see if I can answer your question for you since I also use mylar. The one I use is 4mm thick and it not only reflects but it stops the police flir detectors from being able to illegally search the contents of indoors without being inside through heat signatures forget that nonsense. I use cfl,hps/mh,led panel and ufo led. The reflection is amazing with all the lights but I notice or at least I feel that I notice that it reflects red far better(ufo led is red) then the hps/led(amber) it reflects white pretty well also. It gives the cfl a much better shot at completing a grow with acceptable results. Also what I do is I take pieces of box and cut squares that are just big enough to overlap my container if I set it on top and then I cut one side up to the middle to slide to fit snug against the plant stem. This not only helps with stability for the plant but what I do next is wrap tinfoil around the square pieces and make sure it is as wrinkle free as possible. This reflects the light not used by anything back up through the canopy. You can also use mirrors but I dont advise it since mirrors trap 10% of the light but they do work just not if you are looking to stretch your efficiency to its limits within reason of course due to budget restraints it wouldnt be viable for most people to spend hundreds or even thousands trying to redirect the little bit of light every way you want it because it would be cheaper just to buy more lights. Well I hope this answers some of what you asked and even things you didnt. Welcome to the site and feel free to check out any of my journals or links in my signature. Have a great day.

 

[Khraevyn]

Hey there. I see you new so welcome to the forums its a great place to be. I was stationed in everett and bremerton and lived in lynnwood so I know washington pretty well. My ex lives in yakima. Anyways, let me see if I can answer your question for you since I also use mylar. The one I use is 4mm thick and it not only reflects but it stops the police flir detectors from being able to illegally search the contents of indoors without being inside through heat signatures forget that nonsense. I use cfl,hps/mh,led panel and ufo led. The reflection is amazing with all the lights but I notice or at least I feel that I notice that it reflects red far better(ufo led is red) then the hps/led(amber) it reflects white pretty well also. It gives the cfl a much better shot at completing a grow with acceptable results. Also what I do is I take pieces of box and cut squares that are just big enough to overlap my container if I set it on top and then I cut one side up to the middle to slide to fit snug against the plant stem. This not only helps with stability for the plant but what I do next is wrap tinfoil around the square pieces and make sure it is as wrinkle free as possible. This reflects the light not used by anything back up through the canopy. You can also use mirrors but I dont advise it since mirrors trap 10% of the light but they do work just not if you are looking to stretch your efficiency to its limits within reason of course due to budget restraints it wouldnt be viable for most people to spend hundreds or even thousands trying to redirect the little bit of light every way you want it because it would be cheaper just to buy more lights. Well I hope this answers some of what you asked and even things you didnt. Welcome to the site and feel free to check out any of my journals or links in my signature. Have a great day.

for stopping by and your input. I am very curious myself to see if I can complete the grow with CFL's. I have seen mixed results. But, I don't even know what I'm doing, so it should be one hell of a ride!

 

[SmokerJoe]

Well you have a leg up you are in t he right community whereas when I started I picked the wrong one. I started with just cfl 2 200 watt cfl 1 cool blue 1 warm red. But my point is if you wish it I will subscribe to your journal and give you advice but ultimately it is your grow and I wont get offended if you pick and choose what to follow and what not to.I enjoy mentoring new members and new growers I find it rewarding to watch as their grows get better and better. So again welcome to the site and let me know as most of the people I mentored no longer need it or have no activity on the site for months.

 

[SweetSue]

I've also seen people saying to just paint ur walls really bright white for closets and smaller spaces. I know by choosing the lighting I'm going with,(CFL) I need to get every little bit out of them. If my math is right, the 50' roll at my local grow shop will cover it fine and is only like $17 - $20 I think. I'm fine with that. I was mainly curious because I hadn't really seen any feedback on the creasing of the mylar. I was hoping SG would be able to lay some firsthand on us. Plus, she looks like she's running a combo of lights and I wondered if she had noticed a difference between lights in regards to how well the Mylar reflects and reacts to the different lights.

I will definitely check out the Panda Plastic. I'm like a kid at Disneyland right now. I want to see and do everything!!!!! I am so glad I came across this site! The information has been invaluable. Only ever grown outside in gardens and stuff, so the indoor thing is new to me. I can't even keep the house plants alive. But, I can grow some of the biggest tomatoes and peppers you've ever seen. I hope I make the transition smoothly.

I simply painted the entire interior of my tiny closet with ultra white flat paint. The ultra is necessary. Using a bank of assorted CFLs it was so blinding you needed sunglasses to look in there. LOL. Without knowing what I was doing, and doing much of it wrong, I grew some of the densest buds on a couple adopted plants I have ever seen and the potency was off the charts. As I prepare to plant the seeds in my own no-till (with CO's wonderful guidance) I'm anticipating quality that puts those partial grows to shame.

 

[Khraevyn]

I simply painted the entire interior of my tiny closet with ultra white flat paint. The ultra is necessary. Using a bank of assorted CFLs it was so blinding you needed sunglasses to look in there. LOL. Without knowing what I was doing, and doing much of it wrong, I grew some of the densest buds on a couple adopted plants I have ever seen and the potency was off the charts. As I prepare to plant the seeds in my own no-till (with CO's wonderful guidance) I'm anticipating quality that puts those partial grows to shame.

Thank you for the info. I've been wondering about that myself. I only have 2 bulbs going right now and it is very bright in the closet. All 4 walls are bright white and seem to reflect really well. The ceiling is some nasty popcorn shit, so I am thinking of just tossing some foil on the ceiling and just leaving the walls white. I don't know though. It seems like I change my mind every day.

 

[Gfcollective]

be cautious not to get that popcorn on your ladys.. you wont want to smoke any part of that. i had it in my old grow room, i needed to changed the hooks in the studs for two lights instead of one.. i just sat there starring at my ceiling for about a hour in disbelief about wtf i was going to do.. i ended up screwing 2x4 blocks into the side walls and placed a 2x4 across them so i was just 6 inches below my ceiling ha. i ended up moving it out of that room and will try and never grow in another one. was a headache.

I&i

 

[Khraevyn]

be cautious not to get that popcorn on your ladys.. you wont want to smoke any part of that. i had it in my old grow room, i needed to changed the hooks in the studs for two lights instead of one.. i just sat there starring at my ceiling for about a hour in disbelief about wtf i was going to do.. i ended up screwing 2x4 blocks into the side walls and placed a 2x4 across them so i was just 6 inches below my ceiling ha. i ended up moving it out of that room and will try and never grow in another one. was a headache.

I&i

Funny you say that as I already ran into that problem when I tried to hang a light in there. Had popcorn all in my hydroton. I was thinking of solving the problem in a similar fashion. Just gonna run some 2x4 for mounting and be done with it. I wish I had some other room or area to put them in, but alas, I have not. I do have a pretty high ceiling in that closet though and may need to have several levels for installing lights. I don't know. Next week I am going to be getting more of the lighting setup done so I'll know more then. Maybe rig up some sort of adjustable system or something. Who knows, that's the great part about doing this is thinking on the fly and coming up a specific answer to a specific problem.

 

[Gfcollective]

Not sure if u want to, in a closet I could see it going un noticed. But when I did drywall, if we had to remove popcorn lids we would tape plastic about 4-5 feet high on the walls and along the floor making a cup or bowl form in the given room. It'll sound crazy, but take a hose and put it on mister, spray the popcorn and scrape w a 6 inch highknife or mudding knife at about a 15-30 degree angle and it'll scrape off flat to the drywall like butter.

Them buy a can of texture and spray the lid of the closet when u move out

But a 2x4 was the route I went since my room was a 10x12 w 10 foot lids

I&I

Edit : the plastic was the real thick white. Not the standard painters plastic. Was so thick it was almost a tarp. Don't recall a name other then "the plastic"

 

[Khraevyn]

Yeah, I've done the water scraping trick in previous houses and remodels. I don't even think the landlord would care tbh. It was trashed right before we moved in by one of the neighbor kids and I just fixed it myself to move in faster. We had been homeless for over a year at that point, so I didn't give 2 rats ass what the condition was. I fixed all the holes and stuff, so he was really happy. He's been pretty chill about me growing too. I can grow inside, just no smoking...weird right?? Worst case scenario, I'll grab some white plastic and just stretch it over the popcorn. I don't need access to the light anyways.

 

[COorganics]

Soilgirl
Hope alls well

 

[Jaga]

 

[SoilGirl]

Hi Everyone!! I'm back! and it makes me so happy that the support here didn't stop while I was gone - both grower support and in general. I was planning on sharing my dry ice hash making with you guys while I was in Denver, and I brought my laptop, but of course in the rush of trying to get on the road I forgot something quite important... my laptop charger >.<

Lol I know, I'm hopeless.. - but I didn't actually end up doing anything with my trim, so I'll still be making some hash soon. What I did do, was take that hermie lucy plant with me to denver, and when we got there my friend and I rubbed it into charas and actually got about a gram or so of charas, still a little green, but oh so delicious. Honestly, there's nothing like fresh rubbed terpenes for flavor, I haven't tasted smoke so bursting with flavor forever haha.

And for once I didn't spend any money on meds while I was gone, so my stash may run dangerously low for a short while before I start flowering my veg plants... but this is ok, I made a little money catering nights with a friend while I was gone and I wanted to save it for a decent t5 set to finish filling in my veg room, and maybe one final LED panel to fill in the flowering room. I'll probably do an update later today but if not, it will be tomorrow

Thanks to everyone for sticking around while I was gone and keeping my thread alive!! I'm glad to be back haha.

Much love SG!

Hi Sphnx!!

Have a good time in Denver. Denver? DENVER? You know SG, an Englishman - and I think jaga will back me up on this - has Absolutely No Idea At All what Denver is like.

But whatever it's like, may you have whatever you like there.

Hahahaha I love the answers my fellow Coloradans gave you Mr Teddy, but let me add to it a little - see Colorado in general is a place of general relaxed attitudes, live and let live, full of hard working and hard living people... Denver is where those people get together to get a dose of road rage and then calm down with abundant and legal cannabis. :Laugh2:

To give you a idea about Denver.. Yesterday it was -5 degrees and today 12 degrees high and 9 or lower tonight lol other then that it is awesome!!

Denver Rocks!!
But yes, it is freaking COLD.

Hello SoilGirl. Grow looks good! Considering what I've read on this thread, you are one incredible little lady. I come from a bad home life as well and honestly, the best thing I ever did was leave. It was also the hardest decision I've ever had to make. Very scary to be truly alone and on your own in the world. You seem to have some incredible family and friends. And I absolutely love the way the community has supported and encouraged you. Too many times on forums, all you see is hate being thrown around like rag doll of ignorance. Very impressed to the community as a whole for being mature and respectful of what is obviously a trying time for you. All things become clearer with distance and time.

That being said, what a journal you got here little miss!(I use that term a lot, if it offends I will stop) Very detailed and well laid out. If I had the space I would be good to use this thread as a blueprint. I did have a question.

I know you said you picked the mylar blankets instead of the roll due to cost. I have read that having creases or folds in the mylar can create hot spots. Have you noticed anything like this? I need to wrap my little closet and was gonna buy a 50 ft. roll of the mylar. All I've seen really for my area, but I haven't checked the hardware big boys yet(Home Depot and Lowes). I am always looking for ways to save money. I have lots of kids and none of them are old enough to be useful as slaves yet. So I have to keep feeding them and clothing them. I tell you it's exhausting on my mind as well as my pocket book. ;P

Hahaha it doesn't offend at all, thank you and welcome Khraevyn!! What a thoughtful post, yeah.. this community has gone above and beyond in their support for me (and each other in general at all times) ... it's a great place and I know you'll love it here. Thank you for sharing your personal experience with rough home life with me, and adding to all the support and encouragement.

Hahahaha, I'm sorry your sla-*ehem*-children, aren't earning their keep yet. :Laugh2: I'm sorry for the exhaustion, I can only imagine.
- As for your question, (and I'm sorry to be so slow to respond!!) well I don't use HOT lights, like MH or HPS, just LED's and fluorescents and I haven't noticed any hot spots because of the creases personally... but if I did use MH or HPS the story might be very different. The mylar blankets work for me in my situation but there are con's. A big con is they're really annoying to set up lol, and you have to be careful not to tear them; but if you can get past that they'll work in a pinch and are very cheap. They definitely reflect light well. A word of advice though, really really insect-proof your grow room before adding the blankets if you go that route, you don't want to spray much while they're up or they'll get covered in the spray and not reflect as well.

White and back panda plastic has shown better light reflecting results then mylar if your looking to save money and get a little more out of you lights.

Yeah this is something I've been told by many growers too, and I used to grow inside a completely white closet.. it worked great. I suppose part of me was just super jealous every time I got online or visited a bigger grow that had those fancy metallic walls Lol. It makes me have second thoughts about my current set up - but not enough to do anything about it haha, I'm committed to mylar at this point haha.

I've also seen people saying to just paint ur walls really bright white for closets and smaller spaces. I know by choosing the lighting I'm going with,(CFL) I need to get every little bit out of them. If my math is right, the 50' roll at my local grow shop will cover it fine and is only like $17 - $20 I think. I'm fine with that. I was mainly curious because I hadn't really seen any feedback on the creasing of the mylar. I was hoping SG would be able to lay some firsthand on us. Plus, she looks like she's running a combo of lights and I wondered if she had noticed a difference between lights in regards to how well the Mylar reflects and reacts to the different lights.

I will definitely check out the Panda Plastic. I'm like a kid at Disneyland right now. I want to see and do everything!!!!! I am so glad I came across this site! The information has been invaluable. Only ever grown outside in gardens and stuff, so the indoor thing is new to me. I can't even keep the house plants alive. But, I can grow some of the biggest tomatoes and peppers you've ever seen. I hope I make the transition smoothly.

Now that you mention it; I actually do see a difference in effectiveness depending on the light. the mylar really reflects LED light well. I have a theory on this as well, light emitting diodes don't produce light the way your average light bulb does. They emit a stream of singular light photons, one at a time, in random directions. These photon light particles are significantly more focused than regular light particles which lose 'potency' lets say quickly over distances. (Like a laser pointer versus a flashlight, a mile away that laser is just as strong and bright, and the flashlight isn't).... and so I think for LED's mylar really is the best reflector surface.

Why I say this is because: imagine that laser pointer example I just gave, now imagine you're shining that laser pointer at a mirror a mile away facing you directly... it is completely redirected back into your eye... rather than reflected. Now imagine you're shining it at a white wall facing you directly instead... it doesn't work the same does it? You'd still be able to see the laser, meaning some of its light is being reflected back into your eye, but it wouldn't feel like you're shining it in your eye. --- I think in a growing situation this would mean less power in the light (lumens) reaching the plant after being reflected off of a white surface vs. a mylar one.

Those are just my thoughts though lol maybe I look wayyy dumb because I'm completely missing something, but yeah. I think the mylar makes a big difference for LED growers, but it might not make so much a difference for you.

Since you're just going to use fluorescents, I'd actually recommend taking CO Finest's advice and go with white plastic over some black.

Denver has lots of concrete and people and it smells like growing cannabis. And there are more pot shops then you can imagine.

Well described Sir.

Is Denver in Colorado,, hey Mr Teddy yep you are right

hahahaha hi Jaga!

Hey there. I see you new so welcome to the forums its a great place to be. I was stationed in everett and bremerton and lived in lynnwood so I know washington pretty well. My ex lives in yakima. Anyways, let me see if I can answer your question for you since I also use mylar. The one I use is 4mm thick and it not only reflects but it stops the police flir detectors from being able to illegally search the contents of indoors without being inside through heat signatures forget that nonsense. I use cfl,hps/mh,led panel and ufo led. The reflection is amazing with all the lights but I notice or at least I feel that I notice that it reflects red far better(ufo led is red) then the hps/led(amber) it reflects white pretty well also. It gives the cfl a much better shot at completing a grow with acceptable results. Also what I do is I take pieces of box and cut squares that are just big enough to overlap my container if I set it on top and then I cut one side up to the middle to slide to fit snug against the plant stem. This not only helps with stability for the plant but what I do next is wrap tinfoil around the square pieces and make sure it is as wrinkle free as possible. This reflects the light not used by anything back up through the canopy. You can also use mirrors but I dont advise it since mirrors trap 10% of the light but they do work just not if you are looking to stretch your efficiency to its limits within reason of course due to budget restraints it wouldnt be viable for most people to spend hundreds or even thousands trying to redirect the little bit of light every way you want it because it would be cheaper just to buy more lights. Well I hope this answers some of what you asked and even things you didnt. Welcome to the site and feel free to check out any of my journals or links in my signature. Have a great day.

Thank you Joe! Wonderful share, I'll have to rep you once I'm done responding. That's very interesting to me that you also notice the LED's are best reflected by mylar. And guys, Joe really does put 100% effort into every little aspect of his grow if you couldn't tell already by his share about how he reflects light back up to his canopy (god I feel lazy just reading that lol!) ... and right now in his journal he's doing a very different and intriguing lighting schedule for his plants, check out his journal!

for stopping by and your input. I am very curious myself to see if I can complete the grow with CFL's. I have seen mixed results. But, I don't even know what I'm doing, so it should be one hell of a ride!

First grows are such fun. I know you'll enjoy it and I wouldn't doubt you'll come out of it with some decent meds - you have a great community of support after all!

Well you have a leg up you are in t he right community whereas when I started I picked the wrong one. I started with just cfl 2 200 watt cfl 1 cool blue 1 warm red. But my point is if you wish it I will subscribe to your journal and give you advice but ultimately it is your grow and I wont get offended if you pick and choose what to follow and what not to.I enjoy mentoring new members and new growers I find it rewarding to watch as their grows get better and better. So again welcome to the site and let me know as most of the people I mentored no longer need it or have no activity on the site for months.

I think that's a great offer, and Joe always is generous with his info (as you can see) ... and I'll peek in on your grow as it goes too if you don't mind

I simply painted the entire interior of my tiny closet with ultra white flat paint. The ultra is necessary. Using a bank of assorted CFLs it was so blinding you needed sunglasses to look in there. LOL. Without knowing what I was doing, and doing much of it wrong, I grew some of the densest buds on a couple adopted plants I have ever seen and the potency was off the charts. As I prepare to plant the seeds in my own no-till (with CO's wonderful guidance) I'm anticipating quality that puts those partial grows to shame.

Thank you for sharing the encouragement for Khraevyn, Susan! It's not as hard and overwhelming to grow cannabis as it all seems before you try it for yourself you just have to get started, and the learning and quality will soon follow.

Thank you for the info. I've been wondering about that myself. I only have 2 bulbs going right now and it is very bright in the closet. All 4 walls are bright white and seem to reflect really well. The ceiling is some nasty popcorn shit, so I am thinking of just tossing some foil on the ceiling and just leaving the walls white. I don't know though. It seems like I change my mind every day.

Honestly, keep it white. Then put down white towels on the floor if the floor isn't white. Keep life simple.

be cautious not to get that popcorn on your ladys.. you wont want to smoke any part of that. i had it in my old grow room, i needed to changed the hooks in the studs for two lights instead of one.. i just sat there starring at my ceiling for about a hour in disbelief about wtf i was going to do.. i ended up screwing 2x4 blocks into the side walls and placed a 2x4 across them so i was just 6 inches below my ceiling ha. i ended up moving it out of that room and will try and never grow in another one. was a headache.
I&i

Oh god the popcorn drywall... I can still feel it in my eyes after my drilling in the ceiling >.< Lol great job avoiding getting it on your plants Gfc!

Funny you say that as I already ran into that problem when I tried to hang a light in there. Had popcorn all in my hydroton. I was thinking of solving the problem in a similar fashion. Just gonna run some 2x4 for mounting and be done with it. I wish I had some other room or area to put them in, but alas, I have not. I do have a pretty high ceiling in that closet though and may need to have several levels for installing lights. I don't know. Next week I am going to be getting more of the lighting setup done so I'll know more then. Maybe rig up some sort of adjustable system or something. Who knows, that's the great part about doing this is thinking on the fly and coming up a specific answer to a specific problem.

Sounds like you've got a good plan but as long as your plants aren't in there, its perfectly safe to find a stud and drill into it. I've done the whole multiple levels to clamp lights to thing and just don't - it sucks. Get a yo-yo hanger and safe yourself the headache lol, having easily adjustable height for your lights is something I've found to be paramount.

Not sure if u want to, in a closet I could see it going un noticed. But when I did drywall, if we had to remove popcorn lids we would tape plastic about 4-5 feet high on the walls and along the floor making a cup or bowl form in the given room. It'll sound crazy, but take a hose and put it on mister, spray the popcorn and scrape w a 6 inch highknife or mudding knife at about a 15-30 degree angle and it'll scrape off flat to the drywall like butter.

Them buy a can of texture and spray the lid of the closet when u move out

But a 2x4 was the route I went since my room was a 10x12 w 10 foot lids

I&I

Edit : the plastic was the real thick white. Not the standard painters plastic. Was so thick it was almost a tarp. Don't recall a name other then "the plastic"

Now that's some good advice for that popcorn crap. Wish I'da thought of that!

Yeah, I've done the water scraping trick in previous houses and remodels. I don't even think the landlord would care tbh. It was trashed right before we moved in by one of the neighbor kids and I just fixed it myself to move in faster. We had been homeless for over a year at that point, so I didn't give 2 rats ass what the condition was. I fixed all the holes and stuff, so he was really happy. He's been pretty chill about me growing too. I can grow inside, just no smoking...weird right?? Worst case scenario, I'll grab some white plastic and just stretch it over the popcorn. I don't need access to the light anyways.

That's weird lol. But Idk, I suppose not so weird. Weed while its growing smells good, floral even. Once its been burned it smells like generic ganja smoke, and that smell lingers. :\ at least he's chill with your growing haha. In my old apartment I was always sketching out about a random landlord visit :S not a good feeling.

Soilgirl
Hope alls well

Everything is well for me right now Corgie Thank you. I hope all is well for you as well.

 

[daTenshi]

Welcome back girl Glad you had some time to disconnect... and recharge

Can't wait to see the girls!

 

[SoilGirl]

Welcome back girl Glad you had some time to disconnect... and recharge

Can't wait to see the girls!

Aw hi daTs! it was so nice to get away... it really did me good. And now I have an emergency escape.. after telling an old friend about everything at home, they told me if there's an emergency I can go stay with them. That makes me feel alot better... Plus now my mom is here, and she sees the way my dad is.. she's going to try and move back here asap to help with him. If she does life will be so much better for me.. for some reason my dad is a million times nastier and more volatile when my mom isn't around.

Also I want to get a job here and save up some money... I think my life is going to start getting on track now. its just a constant battle with my dad.. never know when he's going to completely explode. :\

 

[Jaga]

Great that you are back
And you got some money for new lights great ,, in fact I was so happy up to the point when you mentioned your dad being worse when your mum is away,, Now he sounds lie a Bully to me And I don't like Bullies, try an keep your head down an keep them girls safe,, have a great skunkday

 

[Teddy Edwards]

Just noticed that this journal does not yet have its deserved 5 stars. C'mon folks, get your cursors out and 'Rate This Thread'.

Hi SG.

 

[COorganics]

Just noticed that this journal does not yet have its deserved 5 stars. C'mon folks, get your cursors out and 'Rate This Thread'.

Hi SG.

Ok. done.

 

[Teddy Edwards]

Excellent. 5 stars. Tip top job, everyone. Tip top job, SoilGirl.

 

[daTenshi]

I seem to always forget about that
mr T for reminding us!

 

[SoilGirl]

Great that you are back
And you got some money for new lights great ,, in fact I was so happy up to the point when you mentioned your dad being worse when your mum is away,, Now he sounds lie a Bully to me And I don't like Bullies, try an keep your head down an keep them girls safe,, have a great skunkday

Aw hi there Jaga!
Oh I know right, I didn't think I'd come away from that trip with anything except empty pockets after gas expenses, but my friend asked me to help him and his dad cater a couple nightly events. That worked out awesome, I got great tips, someone gave me a $20 just for bringing cocktails over lol! Earning some money really, really makes me want to get a job and become independent of my Dad.

Yeah my Dad doesn't think so but he really is a bully when he doesn't get his way. He can scare me a lot. And he uses that to get his way sometimes.

Today my mom and dad were arguing about exactly that, actually. Long story short, my dad did something stupid and annoying that messed up a carry-out restaurant order, my mom got mad at him for it, he didn't understand why she was mad so she kept getting madder and louder, he sorta ominously told her to knock it off, she freaked out and was like, "I'm not going to live in fear! My children aren't going to live in fear of you! You can't do this -" etc. and my dad just didn't understand why she was upset or even that he had - in a way - threatened her when he told her to knock it off.

But yeah see that would go differently if I were in my mom's shoes and she weren't here. My dad blows up at me.. he just does. I can't yell at him without getting attacked or told to get out of his house. There's no like.. grey area with him and I, it goes from happy nice day in the white, to a horrible day getting cursed out by him, hiding in my room, or on the worst days actually being physically attacked, in the blink of an eye. So fast I usually still think I'm in the white area.

Yeah.. he definitely is a bully and needs to knock that shit off, I think he subconsciously resents me for our complicated past.. whatever. He needs to get over it. I've done nothing but help make his life easier since I moved here, and he's just made mine worse. >.<

I will watch out for myself and the plants, thanks Jaga, I hope you've had a wonderful Skunkday.

Just noticed that this journal does not yet have its deserved 5 stars. C'mon folks, get your cursors out and 'Rate This Thread'.

Hi SG.

Ok. done.

Excellent. 5 stars. Tip top job, everyone. Tip top job, SoilGirl.

I seem to always forget about that
mr T for reminding us!

Aw Gee guys you're too generous lol but thanks for the high praise!

And guess what guys? In some other news.. I met a really nice guy today and kinda hit it off with him.. should I share the story... oh it's me, yes I should lol.

This story (which is epic for so many reasons LOL) starts off in my Dad's bathroom this morning, ...according to my Dad, he was doing his thing on the toilet when he starts feeling water dripping on him. Then he looks up and the paint in the ceiling is blown up like a bubble in a couple spots... (this has happened before) and because the universe had some karma in store for him, yes, a bubble burst and my dad got soaked in ceiling water on the toilet Again which of course made a big hubbub in our early morning household. Daddy was NOT happy.

I had to drive my Dad to the hardware store later, and then back again when his quick fix failed, and eventually we came back with a guy who knew what to do. He turned out to be close to my age, (he's 25) very 420 friendly, very gentlemanly and nice, and I smoked a blunt with him after they finished fixing up the pipe and patching the wall. We were laughing and chatting non stop pretty soon, found out we have lots in common, and he really sweetly asked me out on a date later this week lol. I said ok and we exchanged numbers haha. I'm really excited about that, how cool.. Maybe I'll have a social life in the real world again soon haha. can't believe that..

and lol imagining my dad on the toilet getting ceiling water dumped on him definitely is giving my smile a little extra *glow* today

I hope everyone had a great day, I really did, but I think I'm going to put off my update until tomorrow. But tomorrow it will be a good one. I really enjoyed getting caught up in so many journals yesterday - I spent 5 hours or more doing that lol, and if I didn't make it to yours sorry, I'll get there I'm sure, its not that I don't care about your grow. I just know that the love and growth will continue down the right path without me in many, and I have more to contribute to others.